Sunday 29 September 2013

Day 261, The '' THEY and THEM '' vs the '' ME and WE/US '' Part- 6

now moving to the next dimension which will be the Physical/Behavioural-Dimension.











Physical/Behavioural-Dimension:


***   feel like this physical tension in my chest area when having a look at what ''they'' are doing or not doing within and as this world.


***  I have to continously scratch my head on one specific spot, which is on top of my head in the middle, it starts to ich when i am having a look at the ''they'' as in what they are doing or not doing


***  My body being uncomfortable, not able to get into a position to sit still and stable and comfortable, always trying to find a cozy way of sitting.



Self-Forgiveness Statements:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go through physical tension in my chest area when i am having a look at what ''they'' are doing or not doing within and as this world.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that the judgements and blames i have about ''they/them'' is affecting my physical body to go into tension within my chest area.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that the tension i was experiencing in my chest area is my body giving me a sign for this specific judgement or blame.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that judgement and/or blame are NOT real, and that i only BELIEF them to be real, because i am the one creating the judgement and the blame within and as me and experience them as ME, and thus based on the experience of them in/as ME, i think/belief that they must be real, forgetting completely that an experience is NOT what LIFE is, because LIFE is a FACT, it is right HERE always, doesn't have to be waited on to be experienced, it IS HERE regardless of an experience.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have my head itch enormously on the top in the middle because of having thoughts about what ''they'' are doing or NOT doing.


I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to pay attention to my head itching as in trying to make me aware that i am heavily in thoughts again about what ''they'' are doing or not doing.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to instead of seeing the itching, and stop and look at what i am doing as in participating in my mind, i continue scratching on the area where it itches with the thoughts in my mind coming up still.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that my body always goes into an immediate reaction as in this case itching of specific spot on my head, indicating that i am participating in thoughts, but yet due to me being heabily involved/participating in the thought(s) i don't notice the warning my body is giving me through the itching of me scalp on that specific area/spot.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT sit quiet and stable, because inside of me i am experiencing some uncomfortability and instead of investigating/doing some introspection as in WHAT it is making me inside of myself having these experiences of uncomfortability, i choose to find way to sit comfortable and cozy but NOT deal with the problem of the experience inside.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to ignore my experiences inside of me and try to brush it off by trying to look for a comfortable way of sitting, without seeing/realizing/understanding that the uncomfortability of the body is the indication that i am going through some uncomforable energetic experiences inside of myself which makes the obdy react as it reacts as in; NOT being able to find a comfortable/cozy/stable position to sit.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to make my body to feel physically uncomfortable by participating in uncomfortable energetic experiences inside myself.




Self-Commitment statements:

When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into allowing myself to go into physical tension that will result within and as my chest area, I STOP-------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize i am experiencing physical tension in my chest area, because of my participation in thoughts about what ''they'' are doing or not doing within and as this world.


For this i commit myself to make sure that i do NOT participate into these thoughts and make sure that i am busy with some physical task/chores in order to keep myself HERE within and as the physical touch as the breath and within and as the task/chores that i am doing, either it be doing the dishes or vacuming the living room, or washing the clothes or just writing and being here on whatever point.



When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into judgements and blame, to immediately take a stand within and as myself and Say: STOP!!  ------------- take deep breaths till i am completely stable and HERE and nothing moves within and as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that by participating in judgement and blame, results into my chest area having some physical tension.

Therefore, i commit myself to make sure that to pay attention to when i am in a moment feeling some tension to immediately stop myself in that moment in breath and investigate what i participated in, in a moment that made me have a chest tension, because i have seen now that it is based on some judgement and/or blame.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into loosing myself into energetic experiences, I STOP-------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE, till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i loose myself into energetic experiences in my mind and in this; makes my body have a physical reaction as in my chest area.

Therefore, I commit myself to make sure i am constantly focus on my breath so i don't loose myself within energetic experiences in my mind and if i am to loose myself to immediately catch myself back and bring myself back HERE in breath so i can see slow myself down and look within me to see what exactly made me go into ''loosing it'' in a moment in energetic offshoots. And when these are seen even not clear to take notes in oder to direct myself in them through my writing of Self-Forgiveness and my commitments to LIFE.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into scratching my head that is itching, I immediately, STOP------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that most of the times when i am scratching my head exactly in the middle on top, is because i am in some sort of thought participation that invloves judgment of myself or another as myself.

Therefore, I commit myself to pay very close attention to when my scalp itch in the middle to then have a look within myself if i am really participating in some judgements in my head and to then immediately take notes of the specific judgement either from myself or others as myself and later if i am in a place that i cannot write them out immediately to then when i am at home to investigate what the specific judgements were about and why i had them, in oder to come to a solution for myself that will little by little remove all judgements.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into energetic experiences within me, I immediately STOP,------------ take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize that when i experiencing some uncomfortable energetic experiences within myself, my body reacts in uncomfortability as in; not finding a way to sit comfortable and/or stable or cozy.

Therefore, I commit myself to the moment i see that i am busy not finding a way to sit comfortable, to immediately have a look within myself to see what uncomfortable energetic experiences i am busy participating in, in my mind, and to take notes of these and to write them out in the form of Self-forgiveness and Self-commitment.




Self-Reward:


Within this writing i have seen/realized/understood that there are some physical reactions of my body that are clearly indicating or giving me some hints when i am lost in my mind participation regarding certain/specific judgements and blames either of myself or others as myself, but usually about others as myself. Thus within this now that i have seen this, i can be more attentive and get the hints my body gives in forms of physical reactions when it will happen again, wherein i will be able to work the points out immediately.






Thanks.


Larry Manuela




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Sunday 22 September 2013

Day 260, The '' THEY and THEM '' vs the '' ME and WE/US '' Part- 5

So i am now moving into working out the next dimension, which is going to be the Reaction-Dimension.




                                                 Art done by: Andrew Gable






Reaction-Dimension:



***   Feeling a little anxiety when talking about the ''them'' as in; the ones that have control in the world system

***  Feeling a sense of nervousness when having a look at what ''they'' think/belief against what factually is going on and that ''they'' most of the times if not ALL of the time; choose their thoughts and beliefs above the facts of LIFE.

***  I have anxiety reaction when i see ''they/them'' talking about things as war, as if it is a ''normal'' thing and very much something that MUST take place.




Self-Forgiveness statements:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to react in anxiety when talking about ''them'' as in; the ones that have control in the world system.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to react in anxiety when talking about ''them,'' because i can see within and as the world system that those whom are in control of it, are using it to abuse and to harm LIFE in all kinds of ways.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let anxiety for/about ''them'' within and as my mind to exist and in this way obstruct me from seeing reality for what it is right here and to do what is best for all life in each moment.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that anxiety can only exist when there is fear within and as me as my mind consciousness system.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blind myself with and within anxiety in order to not see the fear that is behind it, that i really need to STOP within and as me, as the mind consciousness system.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to feeling a sense of nervousness when having a look at what ''they'' think/belief against what is factually going on, and that ''they'' most of the times if NOT all of the times; choose their thoughts and beliefs above the facts of LIFE.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that i too, am NOT looking at the facts of LIFE in each moment of breath, right HERE.


I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to within those whom i call; ''they,'' that they are showing me the whom and what i accept and allow myself and others as myself to be in this world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge ''they'' without seeing/realizing/understanding, that judging ''they,'' is judging myself, because when i am judging another or even myself it is within and as ME that judgement is existent and not in the other i am busy judging.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have a reaction of anxiety when i see ''they/them'' talking about things as war, as if it is a ''normal'' thing and very much something that must take place.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not stand within and as war as to understand it completely and in this matter i can direct this point within and as myself and within and as this world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see that i am part of humanity that sees war as ''normal,'' and therefore do not stand up and really END all wars forever more.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame those whom are sending people to war or are willingly wanting to participate and are killing others in war as the reason war exist, when in reality the war starts within myself as the frictions/conflict that are within and as myself as my mind consciousness system that make way for the war outside to manifest, therefore making me and all mankind responsible for any war that goes on within and as this world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself for letting ar exist within and as me and thus; within and as this world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see war as something ''bad,'' without seeing/realizing/understanding, that seeing war as something ''bad'' is just an interpretation of me as my mind consciousness system playing out the program of the ''good vs evil,'' wherein the ''bad,'' that which is  the way of evil must be fought and destroyed in whatever means thus perpetuating and making sure that war continues in the world outside, because inside equals outside, and outside equals inside.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to project ''good vs evil'' outside myself and think and belief that what i interpret as ''evil'' in my mind must then be destroyed in the world outside, because apperently that which is bad is evil and must be eradicated.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that to see ''they'' as the ones doing the ''bad'' thing, either ''they'' actually are doing it or not, STILL makes me responsible for all that happens HERE in this world because i am part of this world as all other creatures that share this world together with me. It is OUR home, not MY home.



Self-Commitment Statements:


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into anxiety when talking about ''they,''  I STOP--------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy as the mind consciousness system.


I realize that i create anxiety within and as my mind in order for me to not put myself in a place of responsiblity to what i can see clearly already that is unacceptable in this world, and then based on this project it on the ''they,'' so leaving me as Self out, then it looks like i am the one free of responsibility, when in reality i am responsible because i am HERE.

Therefore, I commit myself to STOP anxiety within myself everytime it arises and investigate  it/have self-introspection through my writing of Self-forgiveness in Self-honesty to see how i created myself to respond in such a irresponsible manner and understand that which is anxiety completely so i can be free of/from anxiety.

when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into initiating anxiety within me to reach a certain level of fear within me, I STOP----------take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize that i am using anxiety as a pretext to stay within and as certain levels of fear, or that generate fear, so fear can continue having its existence within and as me, as the mind consciousness system, perpetuating within this the fear that it exists within all of humanity within and as this world.


Therefore, I commit myself to make sure that i take little by little, step by step these anxieties that pop up within and as my mind consciousness system, to find out through my writing of Self-forgiveness in Self-honesty to find out where they come from and which specific fear they belong to, so i can stop myself as this fear and delete this fear together with the personality/character that holds the fear as its weapon within and as my mind and act as me in my behalf.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into feelings of nervousness about others as myself, I STOP------------ take a deep breath and continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i get this nervous reaction within me when i interpret within and as my mind that ''they,'' only go for their belief and thoughts and not for the facts as how things really function in this physical world.

Therefore, I commit myself to make sure to pay very good attention to my own reactions and then stop myself through my writing of Self-forgiveness in Self-honesty wherein i  based these reactions within my interpretations that might or might not be so in reality and just look at the facts of what is being presented within and as this world as it factually happened or is happening, because when the fact is HERE, then it is not a judgement nor an interpretation but an actual occurence of what happened or is happening.


When and as i see myself going into or about to go into judging ''they,'' to immediately STOP and take a deep breath or many deep breaths if the judgements doesn't stop, till i am clear and stable HERE, and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i am judging ''they'' when it is because what is existent in the world is also my responsibility and i am trying to put it on someone else, acting as IF it is only their responsibility and not mine, when it is also mine,because i am equally responsible for everything that happens here in this world wether directly or indirectly.

Therefore, I commit myself to always bring my judgement of others to myself to look at what is acceptable or not acceptable and what is not what is BEST for all life and if these are not clearly understandable within myself to use my writing of Self-forgiveness and my commitment to LIFE in Self-honesty to investigate within myself why it is i am not understanding my own judgements and what it is i am trying to protect in Self-interest and to bring it HERE for me to face it within/as myself.

When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into seeing something as ''bad'' to immediately STOP within this mind participation, and take a deep breath and focus on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize that i am seeing something as ''bad'' to keep the program as ''good vs evil'' alive within and as my mind consciousness system, where judgements and justifications and blame, frustration,anger can all mixed with each other and create a wonderful energy mix which is nothing else but abusing my human physical body.

Therefore, I commit myself to throuhg my writing of Self-forgiveness and my commitments to LIFE, to make sure that it becomes clear to me when i SEE something, i see it for what it is as fact without mind interpertrations as in ''bad'' for example and then base on the fact i can direct me in my decision in a moment to choose what will be BEST for LIFE.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into my mind interpretation of what ''evil'' is I STOP--------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE, till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i am using the word ''evil'' to come to the conslusion that it is something that must be destroyed and then based on this mind interpretation of what i have defined the word ''evil'' to be, i then project this into the world and then think and belief that it must be destroyed outside too in the world, what i myself will interpret as whati will see as ''evil'' outside.

For this, I commit myself to investigate the word ''evil'' wtihin and as myself and its opposite and polarity to really really understand it through my writing of Self-Forgivenes and my commitment to LIFE in order to end it within and as me.




Self-Reward:


Within this writing i have seen how i am wasting my time focusing on the ''they'' outside myself in judgement and blame instead of bringing to myself as what i see in common sense that is happening in this world that can be what is BEST for all LIFE to myself that which will be BEST in order for me to be able to give as what i have received myself to give to all of LIFE equal to/as LIFE itself have given to me as itself which is itself as LIFE.




Thanks.



Larry Manuela



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Friday 6 September 2013

Day 259, The '' THEY and THEM '' vs the '' ME and WE/US '' Part - 4

Now i am moving to the next dimension which will be the; Backchat-Dimension.






Backchat-Dimension:

***  why do they act like they don't know or don't understand?

***  what do they think they can do to all of us?

***  Why are we not changing damn it!



Self-forgiveness statements:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have a backchat saying: '' why do they act like they don't know or don't understand?,'' to exist within me as me as the mind as energy.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge ''they'' as in ''they'' not knowing and not understanding, implying within myself that there are points about ''they'' within myself that are not known nor understood within and as myself and is being reflected in the world outside, within the behavior and manners of  the ''they's'' i am judging within and as my mind.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge others within and as my mind without seeing/realizing/understanding that by judging ''they'' i am actually within and as SElf-judgement, thus me judging me, because i am the one with the judgement existing within me as me as the mind as energy.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to think/belief that by having the backchat: '' why do they act like they don't know or don't understand,''  within which i think/belief that ''they'' think they don't know or don't understand whatever, that it really is so in reality, but in reality it can be so or also NOT be so, and by this i am then letting myself be sabotaged by my thoughts by thinking/believing that they are true and real, but they are not, because they do not exist within the physical world outside as a manifested reality.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the backchat: '' what do they think they can do to all of us,'' to exist within me as me as the mind as energy.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use the backchat: '' what do they think they can do to all of us,'' to feel like i am protecting myself and others as myself against the ''they.'' 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to think/belief that i can actually protect reality with illusion as this backchat: '' what do they think they can do to all of us.''

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to even conceive that i can actually protect reality with illusion.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that a backchat in my mind is just that; '' a backchat IN my mind,'' thus can never ever be REAL.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to choose sides within and as my mind and thus project this into the world outside, wherein i will then choose to be against the ''they'' and belonging or forming part of the ''us.'' 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use an illusion in the form of a backchat in my mind to justify why i must continue perpetuating the separation that i project in the REAL world outside, that is only existing in my mind.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to define myself within/through this backchat as if it is the REAL me, when all of is the illusionary me.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use the illusionary me to act in my place within and as my mind to make decisions that are outside that are to be made by the real me, and thus within this i am attempting to make the illusion have an appearance of being real, just because i can through/via the illusionary me have a look at my own interpretation of what i think/belief that is outside of me happening.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the backchat: '' why are we not changing damn it!,'' to exist within me as me as the mind as energy.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have this backchat: '' why are we not changing damn it!,'' to be part of my own projection within what i perceive based on information i have gathered throughout my own life, to measure reality with, without seeing/realing/understanding that i am using past memories to measure that which is actually HERE as what has become what i together with the whole of humanity has built together as one as equal in separation from ourselves as LIFE, wherein i am now only seeing this separation and being now impatient about it, when this is all me, myself that is impatient about my own change as it is reflected within the world outside that i am NOT one and equal to/with/as as LIFE yet.


I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that by using memories that are not what is in fact right HERE, right now, i am then in FACT trying through/via my memories that were nothing but interpretations, to keep myself of taking my Self-responsibility to what i am accepting and allowing in each moment i am HERE, that are NOT what is BEST for all LIFE.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not have patient with myself in order to work myself out, and little by little see all the points that i need to delete in order for me to stand as the real me and not as the illusionary me that are characters and personalities in the dimensions of my mind.





Self-Commitment statements:


When and as i see myself going into or i am about ot go into judging ''they'' within and as my mind, I STOP, i take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i am judging ''they'' as a reflection of myself as i see it within my own mind interpretation as in their behaviour and mannerism, as they not knowing and not understanding, which means in reality ME not knowing and understanding, because it is my interpretation mirrored in them.

Therefore I commit myself to look at all the reflections as in now understand them to be my mind reflections as what i call my interpretations and bring them HERE as me to work them all out so there will be no more they and me or they against us and free myself from my own mind delusions in forms of backchats based on memories as characters and personalities.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into judging me, I stop and i take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize that the judgements i have upon others are my own judgements and only exist within and as me as my mind consciousness system, and thus by judging them, i am actually judging ME.

Therfore, I commit myself to STOP  and wrtie myself  out to delete as in Correcting myself  within me all the Self-judgements that will come up within me till none of them is existent within me, because by accepting and allowing them to exist within me is validating within myself that it is o.k. to let them exist within the reality outside, thus compromising myself to be Self-responsible and get rid of all judgements within this reality, so there can be a world without judgements, but a world where Equality as LIFE is actually lived by all.


When i see myself going into or i am about to go into sabotaging myself, I STOP take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i am sabotaging myself by thinking/believing the backchats i am having within my own mind consciousness system, even when i can see with all clarity that the backchats i am having about reality are NOT actually REAL manifested in REAlity.

Therefore, I commit myself to find out through my writing of Self-forgiveness and my commitment to LIFE, to workout and get rid of all that exists within me that i use to sabotage me into making sure i do NOT take my Self-responsibility to really change me and live me as that which is BEST for all LIFE  in FACT.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into a backchat of what others might or can do against us, i immediately STOP---------take a deep a breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i am using the within the backchat ''they'' against the ''me/us '' to in this way think/beleif that this is a protection in some way or form, when in reality it is just an illusion of protection that i interpret within and as my mind and not REAL protection within and as the reality that is outside, which is the Real Physical Reality. By doing this i am then NOT taking my Self-Responsibility in actual reality, because i am thinking/believing that i am doing that within and as my mind already thus neglecting the reality that is REAL outside of myself as this physical reality.

And thus within this, I commit myself to start little by little through my writing of Self-Forgiveness and my commitments to LIFE to take my Self-Responsibility to that which is actual and real and manifested as this physical reality as what is HERE in fact and get out of the belief of taking care of protecting that i am deluding myself with, within and as my mind consciousness system, till this is done!


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into choosing sides within and as my mind, I STOP------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that by choosing sides within and as my mind consciousness system i am somehow somehow protecting that which i see within and as my own mind consciousness system that needs protection, but in reality i am not really physically moving in making sure that that which is in actuality in need of protection gets real protection, it is just a mind projection of myself based on my own interpretation what protection is, and doing this, i keep on living and participating within and as my mind consciousness system without EVER taking real physical changes that will be waht is BEST for all LIFE.


Therefore, I commit myself to instead of seeing the problems and thinking and believing that i am doing something about them by choosing sides within my own mind consciousness system, i make sure that i transform what i see and bring it to reality as a living example through my participation in common-sense what will be BEST for all life, without having to choose any side, but to actually just LIVING what will be BEST for all of LIFE in each moment.


When and as i see myself going into or in am about to go into projecting my own illusions within and as reality, I immediately STOP-------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i am projecting my own illusions within reality through my mind consciousness system to continue with the perpetuation of separation within this world that is actually only in my mind, and because i live through my mind a make my body live this way, as IF we are separate from each other, when in reality we are Equals as LIFE HERE.


Therefore i commit myself to through my writing of Self-Forgiveness and my commitment to LIFE to bring that which i hold dear within my own mind consciousness system and that i interpret as separation, down and face it and walk step by step through all the layers it may exist as and consist of till they are NO more within me as me thus i can then NOT superimpose or LIVE anymore in this world what is in me, because they are not there anymore for me to LIVE  as and by.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into using myself as the illusionary ME, and NOT the REAL ME, I immediately STOP--------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize that i am using a character/personality that is illusionary to play the part of the REAL me, which is my human physical body within my own mind in order to NOT take my Self-Responsibility within and as this physical reality where physical real movement is required and not mind movements as energy.

Therefore, I commit myself to little by little through my writing of Self-Forgiveness and my 
commitments to LIFE, to STOP the illusionary SELF within and as my mind that i use in order to NOT move physically in real reality, and little by little start walking my Self-Responsibility to what is actually HERE and that are in need of real physical/actual/factual occurences or circumstances and/or happenings, so that an actual real change can happen within and as my participation within and as actual real Reality.


When as i see myself going into or i am about to go into being impatient within and as my mind consciousness system, I STOP-------------------take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i am being impatient within and as myself and then reflect this within and as the world outside as IF it is taking too much time, and thus in a sneaky way perpetuating why the energy as impatient must constinue existing within me as me as the mind as energy, because then i do NOT have to actually do something that requires physical movement, i can just be in my mind being impatient about, thus in my mind being impatient about being impatient without having to really do anything in reality, thus leaving Self-Movement out of the picture, thus NOT actually changing ME to just LIVE in the moment and be HERE as my breath and my human physical body, one and equal as all as LIFE.






Self-Reward


Within this writing i have seen/realized/understood that the backchats i am using are specific to make sure that i do NOT physically/practically/actually and in FACT move within and as this reality within and as my breath and my human physical body and take my Self-Responsibility and LIVE that which is BEST for all of LIFE. Therefore now that i have seem through my own writing what i am doing in order to NOT DO, i can change myself and transform myself into living; '' DOING.''



Thanks.




Larry Alexander Manuela





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