Day 94, Why I Believed..?

I use to be a believer. Now a believer in god, a believer in spirits, a believer in theories that people use, that may sound great, and very believable, but are they true or are they lies, and when i say lies, i am talking here about not being REAL.

 

 

Let me give the reader(you) an example. I can tell you with a straight face, that i have been to China for example. Now you don't know this, you are going to have to belief me or not belief me, and you will belief me according to how you judge me, or not belief me also according to how you judge me. But you will not look for facts as to find out if i for real went to China or not. If you would see in me, as me being someone nice and well mannered you will probably belief me that i am telling the truth, when in reality i never went to China at all.

Self-forgiveness:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let myself be brainwashed into beliefs and took beliefs as more then LIFE itself, without seeing/realizing/understanding that LIFE is the REAL deal, and beliefs are illusions, and for any belief to exist, LIFE is NEEDED, and not the other way around.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to take my mind, the place where beliefs exist as more important and as of more value then LIFE itself, so much so, that everything coming from my mind is being glorified and deified and all that is HERE as LIFE is being abused for the illusion as my mind to experience itself as if it is real.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to belief in love, when love is just another tool of the mind to keep me imprison in it, to make sure i do NOT realize myself as LIFE HERE.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand how in love i had to also belief the other person based upon my assumption as what was presented to me as how the person look like and how she behaves or act, and based on these i will then decide if i will let myself follow the feeling as love within me, because i am clearly not the one creating the feeling of love within me, i just experience the feeling of love within me, thus within this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to never see/realize/understand that I was never in love ever, not even as the feeling itself, because the feeling i just felt it, i was not the creator of the feeling, i was not the one directing myself to feel the feeling as love.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to belief the that LIFE is something to be experienced, without seeing/realizing/understanding in common sense that LIFE is to be LIVED. I realize that experiencing LIFE is not being one and equal with and as LIFE, because experiencing life is being separated from LIFE, it means i am NOT LIFE, i am just experiencing what i perceive within my mind LIFE should be.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to belief that in order for me to LIVE on this planet i require to be a slave, i require to be in DEBT, i require to pay someone, i require to never question authority, i require to at all costs to follow my thoughts/feelings/emotions, when none of these are necessary at all in order for me to LIVE, because the real ME as the human physical body IS already LIFE manifest, and LIFE always supports itself in all ways.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to take the beliefs of my parents and from other people without questioning them, because back then i was just a believer and as believer one just belief. Within this i realize that there is no living involved in believing, and beLIEving is always a LIE from the very start, because it takes one away from what is HERE.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create world as i see it in my mind, hence i live in a world where my mental stuff is being superimposed on that which is real,and abuses that which is real for my illusion and delusion to exist. For me to belief my believes, i MUST use that which is HERE, which is real to try and validate and give my belief a value as if it is real. And that which is real itself i am not being responsible at all for it.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to beLIEf that a beLIEf can be true and real without seeing/realizing/understanding that IF beLIEves were true they would have never been beLIEves, they would just be REAL, no-one would have to beLIEf them in order for them to have a validity of truth.

 

I commit myself to show that  beLIEfs will always be LIES, because the very starting point of any beLIEF it to take someone AWAY from what is HERE, Away from taking their responsibility for what is here.

I commit myself to show that the system of money that we see as so valuable and even more valuable then life is just another belief-system that does NOT have LIFE as value at all within it, it only abuses LIFE and make sure that LIFE suffers.

I commit myself to show that beLIEves MUST come to an END, because they were born, it was not part of what is HERE, had to be invented. What is here as LIFE will always be HERE, because LIFE is HERE.

Thanks.

Larry Manuela

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Day 22, A Situation At work.

Within this blog i am going to do self-forgiveness on a situation that occurred at work and that i found interesting looking at the whole thing when it was happening and what all the participants were doing and saying.  ME and a colleague were having a little trouble by keeping up with the amount of pressure of all the productions that were finished and that we had to bring to the stockroom. But we were short on some plastic bags and he told me to come with him and help him get a box of these plastic bags, he needed just one and because of the whole pallet not being placed on the floor but on a level above the floor where one needs to get it with the forklift he told me that we don't have time so he is going to just step on the fork of the forklift and i am going to lift him up till he reach the pallet with the boxes with the plastic bags in them. Now this of course is not something we should be doing, and we both knew it, and when we were busy doing that 2 other colleagues were walking into our direction and they told us that what we are doing is dangerous and that we know we can't be doing that, and they are right and we both know it and they know it to. Now here is the interesting realization  within all this story. First of i should have said to my colleague that he cannot stand on the fork of the forklift because it is dangerous and if something happens to him i am responsible as he is, because i agreed to do it knowing that we are not suppose to do that, because one can physically harm oneself. But i let it be, because i didn't want to get into a discussion with him about that. And when the 2 others saw us they did criticize us, but that was it, like we did our part of warning you guys but now the rest is your guys own problem, which is not really a self-responsible action either, because if they were really self-responsible they could have walked towards us and order me to put him down and not leave till i did it. This would have been a responsible action coming from them, and this same action is what i must have taken instead of giving in to my colleague request.


Self-forgiveness:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to give in into my colleague reuest for me to lift him up on the fork of the forklift, when i and him know perfectly well that, that kind of maneuver is dangerous and not to be done, because he can fall and harm himself.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself  to fail in this opportunity to say NO when i knew i had to say know, because it would have been a self-responsible action that surely was best for all.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid to say NO, just because i didn't want to ruin the relationship between my colleague and i, if i were to order him around, as this is what i judged he would understand of me doing,which is a mind delusion of course and even if he did, my action still would have stand, because it would have been what is best for all.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to within the realization that i was giving in into letting the whole happening continue, i should have stopped myself and stop the whole thing by refusing to lift him up to reach the pallet in order to get one box out.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge the 2 others that warn us not to do it, by blaming them for not taking the action i/myself should've taken in the first place.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself after i saw how i was sabotaging myself and also others where i should have taken my own self-responsibility without having no-one to blame for me not taking my self-responsibility to/towards what i know is and could have been a dangerous situation because of the possibility to harm oneself physically.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to feel that i have failed to stand my ground for that which is best for all life in this particular incident, where the possibility of harming the body physically is great.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not take the relevant action and say NO and not participate and just bring the whole pallet down, because it was not like it would have taken the whole day, it is just because he wanted to do it fast.


I Forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have an reaction inside myself when the 2 other colleagues addressed us as giving us a warning, where i had a slide of fear inside me that came up and even then i still didn't bring him down.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself enough to say NO when i knew within myself that this is a situation where i had to say NO.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear saying NO, just because of the consequence it might have brought if i had said NO.




I commit myself to make sure that when i am in a situation again where i know, i have to say NO, because it is for what is best for all, i should just do it, no matter what, because it is what is best for all without any doubt.


I commit myself to not judge others because i have failed and was looking for a way out, as in them taking my responsibility for me, instead of me doing it myself.


I commit myself to stand my ground when i see and i am sure it is the moment to take the right action which is the best action, because it is what is best for all.




Thanks.




Larry Manuela




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Day 12, Taking To Much Of Myself To Others.

In this blog i am going to write self-forgiveness about how many times i give to much of myself away just because, of a pattern i have of ''being a good person.''  Within this i am abdicating my responsibility to/towards myself and also to/towards others, meaning; ' i take their consequences on myself and in this not letting them go through their own consequences so they may see/realize/understand what they are creating, and that it has consequences.'


Self-forgiveness:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be nice and good to people just because i myself fear the shame/regret/embarrassment/pain they have to go through if they were to face their own consequences, so i take it away from them before the consequence arrives, so they don't have to go through it themselves, just because i see how i would fear going through it myself and then being shameful/embarrassed/regretful and in pain.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be governed by my own patterns as what i have accepted and allowed myself, as i have been raised to be a '' good person'' and a '' good person'' should be one whom does not let people go through pain and embarrassment and regret and shame.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed such patterns to come up within me and most of the time follow them,just because i fear the person going through the consequences as i would fear myself going through the consequences.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create a pattern within me that take responsibility for me instead of myself being the directive principle and in such i accept and allow a system within me as programs of my mind to direct me.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to say ''no'' when i know i should say ''no''.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to say ''yes'' when i know i should say ''yes''.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be nice to people just because i don't want to hurt them if i were to tell them the things as they really are, tell it as it is..!!

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my own self-responsibility within me being a nice person and in this manner at the same time abdicate my responsibility to/towards the world outside.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have a fear within me to tell it as it is.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to project my own fear within to/towards others as me, instead of me being the directive principle and breathe, and from there express myself in a way that is best for all.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand how i could by not being straightforward have an outflow of circumstances that postpone myself and someone else to go through their own consequences and in so doing support the compounding and accumulation of what it is that needs to be faced, that they have accepted and allowed to be as part of themselves.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be reacting to sayings like: '' you are such a good person'' '' you are an angel'' '' you are sweet'' '' you are well mannered'' ''you are a very clean person'' to be existing within me as me.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to ''feel good'' when they say these sentences to me, like: '' you are such a good person'' '' you are an angel'' '' you are sweet'' '' you are well mannered'' '' you are a very clean person''

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to connect sentences like: '' you are such a good person'' '' you are an angel'' '' you are sweet'' '' you are well mannered'' '' you are a very clean person'' to a feeling that is good.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be talked into believing that i need validation of these people for me to be the so-called: '' good person'' when all that i am really doing is postponing their own consequences, which they as myself fear to go through.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to brainwash myself into believing that by being a ''good person'' alone in this world will at least ease a lot of the problems that we have accepted and allowed to be here as our self-created experiences, without seeing/realizing/understanding that by doing this i am in fact contributing to the problem, because i am avoiding the problem, trying to shovel it away by being nice, instead of exposing the problems as they are, and direct myself into stopping participation in them.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to sometimes not look into the eyes of others just because i fear them fearing me, when i look with my penetrating eyes and that they will find out for themselves that in the way i look at them, that i know what it is they did and what it is they meant.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear my own way of looking to people which is very penetrating and choose always to not do so, and instead turn my eyes away, so the other doesn't have to ''feel'' like i am looking to deep and may find some secrets they don't want to share running in their secret mind.




I commit myself to always to be direct in the best possible way as to support and assist others to go through their own consequences, and not abdicate my responsibility and also make room for accumulation and compounding of consequences that may become more in their future.


I commit myself to always expose all and everything that is not for what is best for all life, and stand my ground no matter what the consequences, because i know i acted from the starting point of that which is best for all.


I commit myself to always look straight into the eyes of people even when they will feel uncomfortable, because of the way i look into their eyes that is penetrating.


I commit myself to not abdicate my responsibility to/towards my own life and all life.




I commit myself to not be reactive to/towards sentences that make me feel good, but instead just breathe and stand my ground and express myself one and equal in and as breath.




Thanks.




Larry Manuela






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Day 11, Reaction on; 'Only Jesus Can Come And Save Us.'

Within this blog i am going to write about a statement someone made on the news regarding the crime that is becoming more and more of a problem in their country and this person said: '' that only Jesus, when he returns back, will solve this problem, no men will be able to solve this problem.''

This is how far we have come, when we abdicate our responsibility not seeing/realizing/understanding that all that is here that we know we don't want, it is all here because of each participating in it. Everyone have given their support either directly or indirectly to all that is here to be the way they are. So if we realize that we are doing all this ourselves and that we are the creators of all that is here as man made, thus it is obvious common sense that it is ourselves that have to stop and change and then create anew, but this time create that which will support all life equally and not which is abusing life in all it's forms and manifestations.


Self-forgiveness:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that because of my allowance of what i see as ''bad'' ''wrong'' ''negative'' is exactly the reason why it is here.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that by trying/attempting to do the ''good'' ''right'' and ''positive'' thing is only perpetuating the opposite polarities, as i have not see/realize/understand that they cannot exist without each other as they are programs of my mind/consciousness to generate more energy for it to continue existing as the mind/consciousness system that i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become within this world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there must be an higher being/force somewhere that must come and save me, because i myself is to weak and the problem seem to big so i cannot take my responsibility and thus must put it in someone else his shoulder, and within this not seeing/realizing/understanding that i am accepting and allowing myself to never ever birth myself as life and live as life, but instead accept and allow myself to be forever more a slave.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see Jesus as the one who have to come and save me and the rest of  humanity, because i see myself as unable or unwilling to to change myself in order for me to change the world with others as myself as and into a world that is best for all life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to brainwash myself to believe  that Jesus will come and save us anyways so i will just sit and wait, or pray and wait, because this means that i don't have to take my responsibility for what I/myself have accepted and allowed to be here and allowed to be done to life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed a character in a book as Jesus to be more then me as life here in the physical and give more power to this character then to myself as to not using my own potential and creative abilities to bring about in a tangible/physical/practical manner that which is best for all life.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand how i can be abdicating my responsibility when i am waiting for Jesus to come and save me.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to invest in my believes and that it means, i invest in my mind and investing in my mind means abdicating my responsibility to/towards life, because my mind has been created and made for me to not find out who i am as life, so whatever is up there in my mind as believes that are of the mind only, will always veil the true me that is to step forth and start directing itself as to birth itself as life here in the physical.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to walk the message of Jesus, what is written that he have said, that i can clearly see, that it is about that which is best for all, but instead have chosen to just be a believer, because being a believer i don't have to take my responsibility for my life and all other lives, i just have to believe and and all will be o.k. in the end.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is something after dead and that all will be fine with me when i die, because i believed in Jesus when i was here, but in this i don't see/realize/understand that if there is an afterlife it will mean that i will be going through the consequences that i have accepted and allowed in this world, on this planet, in this reality, because even when i was seeing it(abuses done to life), i never stood my ground and make sure that it is not part of my reality, my world and so the world and reality of all equal and one.


I commit myself to be responsible for myself and make sure that my participation in this world is one that brings about that which is best for all life till this is done..!!

I commit myself to never give-up or give-in to make sure i do what is best for all life tangibly/practically/physically.

I commit myself to let go of all believes, because none are real, that is why they are called believes, and not LIFE..!!

I commit myself to walk the Jesus message and not believing it, so to make it real.

I commit myself as to be an example as in what it means to ''love thy neighbor as thyself'' '' give so you may receive.''   the messages of Jesus as what he meant as a living principle to be lived by all, and thus i will walk these messages as the who i am so i become the living example so others may see/realize/understand what equality and oneness truly means and in so doing start walking the message as themselves also, so in that way we can have a world that is truly best for all.




Thanks.




Larry Manuela




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