Day 382, day 3 on SF on Aloneness

                                                                        DAY 3 SF on ALONENESS

                                                                            

So with this which is not a real THIRD day for me, however more like a third moment as I have chosen this moment in time to do this writing about myself.

I have written 2 days of SF on Aloneness already, and when I have a look at it, I am aware that I can go deeper than that, and not for the purpose to just be able go deeper, however for the purpose to really face the dark waters that are hidden within and as myself, that keep on disturbing, obstructing me, for me to not change  for real.

So, why am I experiencing myself alone?

Now the real answer is very simple, however yet, it needs to be worked out.

The answer is, because I am not really facing the real points that I am aware I need to face in order for me to really change into and live as a human being that lives “ what would be best for all life, oneness and equality,” which is a principle living. It’s like I am postponing facing myself. Like I do not want to really change yet, let me be system Larry a little bit more longer and then one day, I will take on myself for real.

So, what am I really waiting for? It does not make any sense, I am aware. Why do I want to postpone hiding my dark side, the real nitty gritty about me, what goes on within me and about me that I am aware I am doing or not doing.

Btw, this writing is inspired by the interview I’ve just listen to called:  “ Dark- Self: true nature of Self, by the Atlanteans through the portal at the EQAFE website store.
Here is the link if one wants to have a listen to it: https://eqafe.com/p/dark-self-true-nature-of-self-atlanteans-part-440

So let me list them all for myself here, to put it all into context and perspective  and exposure as I should have done and should be doing,  not only today but also constantly till there is no more LIVING with hidden stuff in my life.

1  1)      SEX. I am someone at the moment,  that will literally and I am being brutally honest with myself here, that would have sex with anyone that is a woman or really look like a woman, and by this I mean transsexuals or transgenders, however they must really look like a woman, because I am not attracted sexually to a man physique. I am not attracted to gay man. And there is more, I am having sex with two women, they both know I am having sex with them. One of them is a Polyamorous kind of person and the other one is someone that loves sex as much as I do. Now even with having two women to have real physical sex with I find myself when I am not with them sneaking watching some porn now and then anyways, it is like I have to have an orgasm, either with them, with porn or sometimes even without porn or just finding other women on the internet that are horny and engage into sex talks to get each other horny and go as far as exchanging sexual pictures or little sexual tainted films of ourselves with one another.

       2) Work. The work I do is not something I would love to do for the rest of my life, it is the kind of work that I just do it as best as I can, because I have to take care of myself within this system, however the continuous pressure to work faster and faster and producing more and more is not my thing, I am a guy that want to do my work properly with as less as possible stress of competing with other companies etc.

       3) My process.  In regards to my process, thus that which I am aware I have to do to change myself into a human being that lives “ oneness and equality, that which is best for all life,” this includes blogging and vlogging  and my DIP course, investigating all systems in this world,  I am legging behind with them and why? Because all of these are the points that force me to face myself and by “ force me” I do not mean that I am experiencing these points forcing me, however more like a push, a point of facing myself, thus I avoid them as much as possible so I do not have to change for real.

       4)  My son. I hear of my son now and then, I would like to be hearing from him more, not because I miss him or anything, however because I am responsible for him as I am responsible for myself and everything and everyone else. There are some points that I see are just excuses I use, because I can change them, but keep on waiting to make a move. For example, he does not have his own phone, and I have to call the mother first, and the mother works and I have to deal with the time difference and also with my working shifts, which means it makes communication very poor, however I can at least make some arrangements to change all of this so it can have an outcome that is best for all. So here for example I see that I always had the pattern of waiting too long to do something or to move, take action, I always let things accumulate till it becomes a problem or bigger problem.

       5)  Debts. I have a few system debts, some I was responsible for making them, however some I was not and I am in the process of dealing with them all, meaning taking organizations or companies to legal court lawsuits, which drains me financially, however I have to do it.

  6)     I am a nice guy. This is how people that know me will define me, however I do not want to be a “ nice guy” I want to be a real guy, someone that lives: “ giving a fuck about life.” This means that I sometimes let people push me around or walk over me a little, but all very calculated, I have always been this very calculated person ( another point here to face.) I calculate shit in very little detail about what could happen or not happen, I used to be a great deceiver, and patterns of the “ greatness” are still here. This “ greatness” is actually weakness, weakness into making sure I avoid as much as possible consequences that can harm me or make people not like me. I have found like a middle ground so to speak throughout my life in order to deal with these points, so I let people sometimes walk over me just enough in order to keep on being looked at as “ the good guy.” However as I said already I am aware that “ good guys” can never be “real guys”  because real guys give a damn about ALL life and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!

O.k. So that is my dark self as far as I can see, now in the next blog I will be going into the specifics as I do Sf on all of them as to HOW I really do them. As they are written down here now they are just empty sentences, not yet faced, exposure though, but not faced yet through self-forgiveness.

Thanks.

Larry Manuela

Join us at: Desteni

Have a look at Equalmoney the solution to all the problems in this world.

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Day 366, Do You Think You Are Gonna Make It? PART3

So no continuing with now the last phases of the working out of the points regarding this particular question to myself.

For context here are the links to the previous blogs relating to this point.

http://larry7yearwalk.blogspot.nl/2015/11/day-365-do-you-think-you-are-gonna-make.html

http://larry7yearwalk.blogspot.nl/2015/10/day-364-do-you-think-you-are-gonna-make.html

Self-Commitment statements:

I realize that I am within my mind wanting to give up on what it is that I need to do within my life, within this world, thus I keep on back chatting about it within my mind consciousness system.

I realize that I am not in every moment when I am allowing back chats to surface within me. to actually stop participation in them, however I go with the flow of the back chat within my mind.

I realize that I have created  fear based personalities in order for me to be against myself to make sure I do not have to change me into someone that only do what is best for all life.

I realize that I fear my own creations within myself forgetting and/or not seeing/realizing and understanding that I am the creator of them within and as me.

I realize that I let fear influence my decision makings instead of my common sense directive, life principled based.

I realize that I want to get rid of my mind consciousness system, because I think and belief that would be the easy way out, even though I am aware that the mind consciousness system is what I have become and cannot do that in the moment.

I realize that I am seeing and treating my own mind consciousness system as THE enemy, without wanting to understand the HOW I created this so called enemy to represent myself.

I realize that I am thinking and believing that I can win from my mind, even when I am on some deeper levels of myself aware that this process is not about winning or losing, however it is about standing within and as myself as life HERE. I do see/realize and understand that winning and losing is of and as the mind, a polarity/opposite game where the mind is always the winner, because when I participate it can generate energy from my body to continue its existence within and as my body and within and as the world through me.

I realize that I too much focus on all the points I have to work out about myself to change myself, telling myself to give up or give in, however I avoid focusing on the part of me that do not want to give up nor give in, however more want to really just stand and take stance and live that which is best for all of life.

I realize that I am doing less and less, because of letting/allowing myself participation within and as my mind consciousness system, wherein I loose focus in what needs to be done in every moment.

I realize that I am wishing and desiring and wanting a big shit to hit the fan, my world to collapse before I can direct myself into doing much much more, as if that is the only way I accept about myself that I will then be able to really stand and take a stance.

I realize that my wishes/wanting/desires for shit to hit the fan in my life and in everyone else life has to do with me keeping the judgment alive within myself in order to not move myself and actually change myself in be/becoming that which is best for all life, thus using all of this as a justification to not engage in changing myself.

Thus within all this, when and as I see myself going into or I am about to go into wanting to give up on myself and on life, I take a deep breath and bring myself back here, till I am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

When and as I see myself making decisions based in fear or on fear and not common sense, as that which is best for all life, I take a deep breath and bring myself back here, till I am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

When and as I see myself going into or I am about to go into treating and seeing my mind consciousness system as THE ENEMY, I stop----------take a deep breath and bring myself back here till I am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

When and as I see myself going into or I am about to fix my focus on those things that make me want to give up and give in on myself, I STOP..................... take a deep breath and bring myself back here till I am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

When and as I see myself deliberately acting as if I am not aware that I am the one creating the the creations as thoughts/fears/emotions/judgments within myself, I stop.............. take a deep breath and bring myself back here, ground myself till I am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I commit myself to stick to my focus on changing me in real moments of application within my personal daily live, and put the focus on the solution side of the coin and not on the problem side of the coin, because I am aware within myself that EVERY problem has a solution.

I commit myself to really have a very good look at myself within making decisions, so when I do so they are not fear based, however are common sense based with an outcome embedded in it that will lead to that which is best for all practically.

I commit myself to really practicing in moments really embracing myself as mind as who I am now first and forgive me as it to not treat my mind as my enemy, however as the part of me I need to understand




Thanks.

Larry Manuela

Join us at: Desteni

Have a look at Equalmoney the solution to all the problems in this world.

Support our research and buy one or more products that will assist and support you greatly in understanding what is actually going on in life, through;  EQAFE

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Day 362, The winds of Back-Chat.

I have chosen this title for my blog, because this is how I experience myself inside, if I would
give a practical/physical example of it. It's like being a coconut tree in the middle of a hurricane and the winds of this hurricane swing the tree from left to right, back and forth. Thus the tree is being badly hammered by the winds.


                                                                       

So let me go now into the specifics. I have been gravitating on the process of clearing myself from some debts I have, and every time it looks like I am going to finally, at least get a break and really be in a situation where I have a " normal"  money flow and my expenses I need to pay are not behind, but all on time,---------- However something unexpected always seems to happen to my children or some very good friends of mine, where I find myself in a situation that I cannot say: "  sorry, solve your own problems yourself!"  Either my kids really really need some money immediately or a friend is totally F***** and needs my help.
Than a point opens up that I do see, that it is a pattern, and this pattern I have been doing it for a very very long time, and it is this: "  I always weight/judge the situation of another, as worse than mine, thus I help this person first and see afterwards to myself, because I think and believe, I can still help myself afterwards,"  making few arrangements and agreements to pay what I have to pay in little parts till I am back on track again. However I have seen that this makes me fall behind all the time, and it is not like I am going to get some extra money to cope with this " fall back." Therefore, it will take me months afterwards to be on track again, and than BOOM, the same story again and again year in, year out. And within all this I than have the back chat: I am tired of this S***."
And I have to say that this back chat is not related or projected to these people, but to the situation of always having money shortage. Sometimes I wake up and I do not want to even go to work, because I know the whole salary is about, getting the money to refill the hole, in paying back what I am running behind with, with payments.

Self-forgiveness statements:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be blown side to side up and down inside myself by the back chats I allow myself to have within and as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate being in a situation of having to have debt, that it makes me impatience, because I want to solve this problem immediately.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, because of wanting to solve this problem immediately, I run a muck in my mind looking for ways to solve it immediately instead of looking for other solutions that may not be immediate, however will alleviate the problem in the start and at least give myself some room to breathe.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to keep on blaming myself to find myself within a situation of debt.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate debt.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel so ashamed of having to have debt, that I allow myself to not go anywhere and also not talk to anyone to avoid anyone coming close to me and finding out about my situation in relation to debt.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have as less contact as possible with people, to avoid them asking me if they could come visit me, because I am ashamed of my house not being livable ready yet and I knowing that it is going to take a long time before I can get it to a level where it will become a comfortable living environment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel ashamed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to also make sure that when I meet women on the internet that they are always far away from me, not close to the city I live in, so it won't be easy for them to say, that they want to come over/visit.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what people may think and say about me being in the situation I am, because I am ashamed of myself for being in it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the back chat: "  I am tired of this S***,"  to exist within me as me as the mind.

I forgive myself  that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sorry for myself.

I forgive myself  that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that due to the long dragging of being in financial difficulty, I just have no zest in anything I am doing, and eventually I end up doing nothing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my problem as " never ending."

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sometimes be angry at people, whom SAY and act as if they have no money in conversations, however in real live their way of spending show the truth, just because I am the one really without money, or very little money and when I say it in conversations it is not a lie.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge people as liars.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try and leave myself out of the judgement of being a liar, when I am aware that I also do lie in some instances to save myself from certain/specific situations that can compromise my well being or my survival in the system, thus I avoid on the surface to not judge myself as a liar as the others, because what I lie about has to do with " something that matters"  and they lie about something that does not matter or hurt lots of people. Thus Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to find within myself a justification as to what  weighs more to be lied about or not.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize and understand in the moment of me lying about something to save myself of consequences, that I am busy in reality contributing to the lie that exist within this world that is the equal with the one I am busy, namely: "  to protect self-interest."

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall within the believe of:  " if I am lying to protect my self-interest, because it will have a good/positive/right outcome for me," that it is than o.k. to tell a lie.


To be continued........................................




Thanks.



Larry Manuela

Join us at: Desteni

Have a look at Equalmoney the solution to all the problems in this world.

Support our research and buy one or more products that will assist and support you greatly in understanding what is actually going on in life, through;  EQAFE

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Study this  proposal which is:  LIG

Day 359, Have you walked the 40 Miles for water each day, says the poor man?

A dialogue between a rich man and a poor man:


Poor man:                                        

My back hurts from all this waking up early in the morning to go to a well
that is 40 Miles away from where I live. I have to walk up there to reach it.
I got to do it, otherwise my 4 children, my wife and myself would be without water.
Water shortage started 2 generations ago, from my generation.
We have had many promises for help, but none ever effective.
First the wells closer to my home dried up, and then we started to look for wells further away.
My older daughter helps me sometimes with carrying water back.
We used to have a dunky, but she died, and now since there is less water available,
taking care of the animal stocks has become even more challenging.
Right now, I only have 2 goats, 1 duck, 3 chickens. I try my best to take care of them.
I know that someday soon one of them is gonna go, because we just need to eat too.
It breaks my heart having to kill my animals, especially when they grow so close to me.
But we gotta eat! but for how long?


Rich man:                                

I am driven to my business each morning by my personal chauffeur.
I do not really communicate with my chauffeur. I just give him my schedule
in advance so he knows to be there when I need to be somewhere.
My children, they have everything money can buy. I work hard for them to have
anything their hearts desires. I am aware that I do not have actual time to be there for them,
but we live in a world where money rules, thus money comes first in my life.
Without money, my happiness and that of my children will be none existent.
The way I have to do business is also not something to really be proud of in reality.
It is a world of "dog eat dog."
But as I said in the beginning, I have to make money and as long as there is this opportunity to
make more and more money, I will do whatever it is in my power to make more and more money.
So to you my fellow poor man, I find that you are just someone who complaints about their situation a lot,
and don't really do whatever it takes to get yourself out of it, its like you have no more will-power.
We Rich people, don't ussually adress poor people as dispicable in public, but I have to give it to
you now. We find you within our mids a dispicable bunch!


Poor man:

Well rich man, it is very easy to find me dispicable, when you have not actually really stood
in my shoes. It is very easy to see me as a scum of the earth so to speak. It is very easy to have all kinds of
judgements about me. It is easy to ignore me, very easy to treat me as less human than yourself.
At the end of the day, and this day when it comes, it is always going to be in a moment of time right HERE, because to the
moment in time it doesn't matter, it is just another moment in time, where we each get to sow what we reap, face our consequences, what we have accepted and allowed to be done to LIFE when we are here.
The trees you see, are in every moment standing completely as trees, they are never influenced to be something else they are not, there is NO way a tree can make itself belief itself to be something else, the same goes for any other expression that is NOT a human. However us humans, we are a bunch that loses itself in believing itself to be something else that it is not, and what it is for real, it doesn't give it value at all, because what it believes itself to be is of much more importance and value.
That thing the human belief itself to be within his mind, veils the human to see, to realize and to understand that the life that is within and as him is equal in everyone and everything else. The human cannot see that this life is equal in everyone else and everything else!  The human believes, based on its very own make-believe world in his head, itself to be a system of believe systems as what it really is, that this is of much more value than the life that is within and as him. Thus the personalities the human believes itself to be, because he experience them as an energetic experience, is what the human think and belief it is for real, more real than its human physical body/form, the real physical expression of LIFE.
So, based on this understanding, my fellow rich man, you have only managed by seeing me as dispicable, because you have allowed that which is defined by men as dispicable to be here and instead of standing up and stop it and change it, you allow life in another as yourself to be dispicable, therefore, I am dispicable to you.

Rich man:

Whateverrrrrrrr........!!!                

The moral of this story and coined dialogue between a rich man and a poor man is to bring to the topic of what lots of rich man are thinking and believing about someone that is poor. And understand when I say: "rich man," I am NOT explicitly saying someone that is a multimillionaire alone or a Billionaire, I am saying, ALL of us that are capable of being able to have their survival needs met.
This believe system is a very strong believe system, because it will make one always being against any solution that will eradicate poverty forever more. Real practical solutions that will be permanent to eradicate poverty, these rich people, will resist it no matter what, and if they are in a position where they can put more pressure on the resistance to protect and enforce their view point, they will.

So I implore you the reader to have a good look within yourself as I do, to see if there are any judgements, thoughts, reactions within you about poor people, to remember that YOU are here and you ought it to LIFE to make sure LIFE is dignified in whatever form it expresses itself as within and as.




Thanks.


Larry Manuela

Join us at: Desteni

Have a look at Equalmoney the solution to all the problems in this world.

Support our research and buy one or more products that will assist and support you greatly in understanding what is actually going on in life, through;  EQAFE

And do the life course and perfect yourself: DIP

Study this  proposal which is:  LIG

Day 355, A dream with the word " Incentive" as a password.

Before I continue with the series I am busy with I am going to workout a dream I've had last night. I am going to be as specific as I can with what is left as memories of the dream and step by step work them out.



                                             

However first, one must understand that when one is dreaming and one is seeing familiar people or friends and family or even strangers in dreams, that ALL of that is oneself. All of these people and also places within the dream are memories that one has accumulated about people and places and now the mind is scrambling through them and making a movie most of the times of a story that doesn't make any sense and where scenes are throwed all over the place, events, weather and time changes in matter of seconds and most of the times one does not experience time as one would experience it when being awake. In the dream everything seem to be focused on the moments, its like frame to frame to another frame, If it is from day to night or vice versa from frame to frame doesn't matter........if they are related or not doesn't matter either. Dreams where there are certain people in it or there are certain events going on seem to be abruptly stopped sometimes and another completely new dream will just start. There is no chronological story telling in the dreams, it is like the shooting of images with people and places and events around, like someone is throwing cards in the air and see how they will land either facing up or down.

Thus dreams are our own memories about people, places and events and also together with all of that, our judgements/reactions we had about these people, places and events, either recently or way in the past.

So now to the dream.
I was dreaming that my ex. was somewhere and she went there to get something for me to do some work in a house that was not hers neither mine, but that I was just there and had to do the work in that house, and the place where this house was situated was somewhere in a very poor area where the street in front of the house was not asfalted and was dirty/messy and dark as it was at night when this was going on, the street lights were very poor.....not giving much light, making it very difficult to see. The houses all of them on that street were in very very poor physical conditions. What exactly I had to fix in that particular house I was in, I do not remember.
Than suddenly my ex. called me from the car she was in with the children, with some man driving.....and when she called me, its like I can be in the car watching her talking to me......you know...the kind of scenes that only happens in movies and not in real life?   that view, that kind of scene, like one is hovering around where someone else when one is actually in another place at the same time.
And I can see her and hear her telling me via the phone that she needs me to put money on something that is called "Ipay," which btw is a real casino like thingy where one can put Icoins on it and play casino online. One can be paid with real money by transforming these Icoins into real money. And she was telling me to put X amount on that for her, because she uses that to pay things with. I then told her that is very nice however, how am I going to put it on your account if I do not know your "password."  Now understand, since when do one have to have a personal password from someone else to put money on their account for them?  And then she answered with such a trust: " it's INCENTIVE, the password, you fool.....hihihi."
Now in the dream or during the dream itself I am asking myself: " wait a minute here, what is this word telling me about myself, I have to remember this when I wake up."
And how I was experiencing myself within that dream was a little stressed as exactly how one will experience oneself when one's money is not enough to buy things and one is short on money.


So what are the points according to myself that I need to work out?

words or phrases of importance to myself.

*  being at lost in a house that is not mine in a poor neighbourhood
*  at night where poor visibility conditions are as to be expected
*  the street being not asfalted and looks dirty/messy
*  asking for a personal password from another
*  the money being on a casino like game
*  password being "incentive"
*  experiencing myself as stressed within the dream
*  being able in the dream to remind myself to remember it when I wake up



Self-forgiveness statements:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe within my mind consciousness system that it is possible for me to get lost, when the reality of life is showing me that life is always here, thus I can never be lost, only in my mind can I create such concepts as loss to exist within as me, and than through this live that through body acting as if it is really so, that I am lost in reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within my dream finding myself being in a house in a poor neighbourhood impossible to be mine, or me living there, thus within the dream camouflashing it as me being in a strangers home.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being poor and being in a poor neighbourhood.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being poor and living in a poor neighbourhood, because I am aware that in that situation I will be living a very stressful and compromising life, where life will be very challenging.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to see clearly, and have a fear within myself within the dream that project the fear of not seeing clearly unto the light of the streets that do not give much light, however it is within myself that I am fearing my own unclearness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to instead of puting on paper if it is necessary or access the awareness in a moment of what exactly is unclear about myself within myself I keep it intact within me by looking at it alone, however not applying myself really when there are moments when I see it, or see myself doing it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be unclear about the whom I am within and as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use this unclearness about me not being aware of whom I am in every moment to be in my own way of seeing clear, because now i have made it a focus within my mind, where I am seeing that something is unclear however do not see that seeing that something that is unclear is the very point itself that is in my way of seeing clearly.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to find within myself something not nice and also unacceptable to ask for a personal password of someone else from that someone else, because I am aware that I have a fear within myself that, if someone would have my personal password they will be able to have control over whatever it is I had a personal password for.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to actually have an issue with passwords, because I have programmed within myself to see passwords as something that is in reality unacceptable because it is contributing to keeping secrets from others, and having secrets mean to me that I am doing something that is not what is best for all, or can have many outcomes that will not result into what will be best for all, thus I keep it a secret so it will have an outcome that is best for me alone, even though this is so in reality, yet I am also aware that for the moment I have to have passwords for certain things in this world, because I am already living within that which is the outcome of having secrets and keeping secrets within myself and from others, because I want to abuse others.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think of myself to be dirty within and as my mind about how I look at a point I am busy with which is the point of sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see sex as dirty and with the word "dirty" it means that I am busy cheating myself into doing something to myself and also others as myself when I am aware I should not be doing so.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to to keep sex as how I am busy with it as something that is secretive and because I am manipulating lots of women to have sex with me, I am making a mess out of myself and creating unneccessary challenging outcomes for myself and for others as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize and understand that the street not being asfalted in my dream is actually telling me about myself that my sex life is not stable and I am not directing myself within and as it, that I am not being clear about myself about sex with women, as if I do not actually really have any ideas as where I have to be within sex with women.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see money as something mostly that I always loose, meaning; that I am on the receiving end and this receiving end is not what will be best for me, because the casino system of money wins always, wherein I have created within my mind a personality that is always treating money as if it means nothing and also spending it as if it means nothing, not really actually directing me with money and give the money I make a destination that will be best for all always, however find myself trying to help others most of the times even with the little I got, and leaving supporting myself out even though I myself also have points that I need to take care of with money, because I see in that moment that the others are more in need of the money than myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that by giving money to people that are in need is in a way doing with money what is best for all, when in reality deep within myself I am aware that it is not a permanent solution and that this very point is me acting out on money itself, because I have created a disgust to/towards money within and as me, thus I am giving money away from that perspective of me being in disgust with money, even though on the surface I am giving it away with "good intentions,"  as I see how the race I am part of have accepted and allowed its creation as money to be something that harms life on earth and I am against harming life on earth, thus I act out on the money we as humans have created within this world, without seeing/realizing and understanding that I am not actually living to/towards doing whatever I can to come up with a solution that will actually/practically have an outcome that will be best for all, and thus I give with my money, disgust instead of support that will be best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not have any incentive as in myself I am seeing that I do not motivate myself to create a practical solution that will have an outcome that will be best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not have any incentive within and as myself, becasue I am using excuses within myself and also blame to/towards myself and the whole of humanity that I and the rest is too late, that it is all done, no-one wants to hear anything about change actually, and especially changes where everyone is benefitting.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have given myself the permission to give up on myself and also on others as myself and focus within myself on the point of "everything is lost"  or " I have lost everything" to exist within me as me as the mind as energy, wherein I compromise myself and do not direct myself anymore as I should have, and let my moment of actually creating connections that will lead to waht is best for all pass me by.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience stress within and as myself as I see and interpret my own life as " I  have lost everything," as a failure and as a point where there is no return, when deep within myself I am aware that there is actually me rising up and standing up within and as myself in every moment here is what I should be doing, should be focusing on, however, I let myself down by giving up on myself, and thus giving up on life within and as myself and within and as everything that is here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to even though I see what is going on in this world and even know what I have to do and how I can apply myself I still choose to give up on myself as giving up on myself does not require any physical movement of change in practical terms, however it does have a physical/practical result that is not what is best for all life, and that is totally clear to me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize and understand that giving up on myself whenn I am aware of what it is I need to do is creating unneccessary stress within myself that actually helps with the stagnation of not moving myself, not directing myself to stand here firmly.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize and understand that even within my dreams I am still somehow aware of what I am doing and even reminding myself to look at a point where I am having a challenge with, but instead of moving myself and apply myself as I should do, I just glorify within myself that same point where I find myself fascinating how I can even within a dream still interupt that and infiltrate the thoughts processes that are going on to remind myself to stand, and that this means that I can do it, I just have to really take a stand.




In the next blog I will be writing the commitments in regards to this dream.

Now before I leave here, I have seen/realized and understood within my own dream that even though a story looks unrelated and people and places are given certain expressions, it all is in its own way letting me see whom I am within and as myself and that it has nothing to do really with the people, the places, events and so forths...........it is all about whom I am within and as myself.



Thanks.


Larry Manuela

Join us at: Desteni

Have a look at Equalmoney the solution to all the problems in this world.

Support our research and buy one or more products that will assist and support you greatly in understanding what is actually going on in life, through;  EQAFE

And do the life course and perfect yourself: DIP

Study another proposal we have, which is:  LIG

Day 348, DEBT in the money system; The killer invented by humans!

The words and sentences used in this world in relationship with the word: "debt."


                           

Words & Phrases:

Crisis
Austerity
Civilization decline
pursuing downsizing
suffering finances
deflationary drive
Threat
weak demand
high government spending
income tax
For the LOVE of money is the root of all evil
stimulus
welfare
bankrupt
private banks
tax evasion by corporations
fiscal and monetary policies
hoarding money
gambling with the people's money
taking (high)risks
corporatization of governments and countries
restructuring of the monetary system
ownership
funds
refunds
impoverish nations
financial reforms
cut off
critical liquidity
credit line
unemployment & underemployment
cutbacks
people's values
dead deposits
bail-outs
federal reserve
central banks
IMF
World bank
Lenders
costs
inflation
hyper inflation
skeptics
stripped from service
experts on economics
deadline
competitive bidding
violation of constitution


recession
depression
deficit
crash
collapse
inequality
undemocratic
manipulating the financial markets
free market
capitalism
free market capitalism
investors
housing bubble
quantitative easing
neo-liberal
growth
decline
commercial banks
poverty
the poor
starvation
hunger
war
elite
secret services
shadow governments
conspiracies

wall street
tax havens...........................................................................



I can go on and on with these words we use today that are mostly pertaining to the subject of economy.
We have managed to come up with so many words that in fact make things much more challenging and harder in relation to our living and surviving on the planet.
Understand that money as we know it is just an idea made manifest by us humans, we just agreed that money should be the way we would share the resources of the earth.
We take money so serious as if life itself depends on money, when in reality everything is depended on life, even death.
What is so funny and yet also so seriously dangerous is that we take this whole system as something we cannot do anything about it, and as if it is THE most important thing ever, when in reality it is soooooooooo limited and so easy to get rid of.
What makes it appear as if it is something so difficult to do or whatever, are these words we invented to make it sound so sophisticated and out of our reach, something that takes tremendous work and have high degrees of difficulty, when all in all it is all really simple. We just got lost along the sophistication of words and of systems and forgot totally the simplicity of life.

All the above words are very well mentioned in the news and in the languages that are being spoken in this world at the moment, because there is an imminent threat going on that what we have as this system is counting its last days. We all fear the consequences.

But one must understand the following;

When money dies, the resources of earth don't die with it.
The plants that you eat, don't die with it.
The animals you depend on for your survival don't die with it.
The water you use don't suddenly evaporate and its gone.
 The house you have built and is living in, will not disappear.
Your body, will not suddenly die.
Your ideas will not leave you empty.
All the roads and bridges we have built will not crumble and fall down
Rain is not going to stop suddenly.
The land you live on it not going to disappear.
The knowledge you have about how to do certain things, and how to survive will not suddenly leave you.
The doctors, the engineers, the construction workers and you name it, all of these people will not just suddenly disappear and/or loose their knowledge about what they do, because the money is gone.
The people you use to have relationship with to exchange goods in other countries, will not suddenly disappear together with the goods you used to get from them.
Your fridge is going to continue working.
The clothing you wear, are still going to be here, and the people and the machines and the resources to make the clothing are all still going to be here.

One can see where I am going with these. I am conveying here that everything that actually makes our living here possible, all the relationships that are here, between people and and the rest of what is here, are all not going to disappear because money disappeared.
But yet, here we are acting as if that is what is actually going to happen. Now understand that because we have limit all of these and tie them to money, it will in the beginning feel like and actually people will go through certain very extreme situations, but it all does not have to happen like that.
The way we are being controlled is through fear and through laws, to make sure we don't just turn our backs at those who are controlling the masses and using the masses for their own self-interest.
By making laws to protect them in being in control of the resources we use, was and is the way one  can loose all the relationships that are here and that are in need of people interactions and labor and ideas to happen in the real physical, practical world.

All the words and few phrases I have placed even though some may have a positive inclination to them, one must understand that in their totality and combined existence in this world in a system of debt, they all lead to the same outcome, namely: "destruction, harm and abuse to/towards all life on earth."

Thus, join us to keep on planting the seeds of LIG proposal till it is just on the grabs for people when the time is right as this can be anytime.



Thanks.

Larry Manuela

Join us at: Desteni

Have a look at Equalmoney the solution to all the problems in this world.

Support our research and buy one or more products that will assist and support you greatly in understanding what is actually going on in life, through;  EQAFE

And do the life course and perfect yourself: DIP

Study another proposal we have, which is:  LIG

Day 347, Give me a Job, I need a job?!

Here we are in a moment in time, where finally we are all going through the same thing again, where we are seeing that the jobs we have are not really for purposes of bettering our living on the planet. Jobs purely exist right for purposes of getting money or for making money,........nothing to do with LIFE!!!!

The crashing of the system of money that is going on now, is worse and will continue to worsen up till we stand up, because this time it's different than the previous times it happened in the past, because now we have accumulated enough damage, where looking for a war to stop and make a reset with the same old thing again will not suffice. We have exhausted and consume more and more of the resources, we have become purely a bunch of consumers, doing nothing else than consuming and consuming, especially in the "rich countries."  Or to be more precisely, the "rich people," which is everyone that can afford a job and can pay for their survival needs without much difficulty, in two words: "The Have's."


                                                                

When I have a look at the people living in this country and also at other people in other countries, they all blame the politicians for not producing enough jobs......that is all they all talk about constantly. We need more jobs, we need more jobs, there is not enough jobs, people are without jobs......jobs, jobs, jobs,jobs, jobs...........If I put on the T.V. and go through the channels where there are news and social programmings going on some television talk-shows, I will hear this word, job again and again on the tips of the tongues of the people, over and over, everything is being placed on the shoulders of the word: "job." As if having a job is having a life. Unfortunately it is so in this system of inequality we have accepted and allowed, however this does mean that it HAVE to be so.


                                                    

So one can say for certain that this delusion about: "MUST having a job," in order to have a life on the planet is as good as imprinted within the minds of all human beings that they can only interpret and see jobs and no jobs. When having a job and getting the reward in the form of money doing the job, we are happy, but as soon as there is no job and there is then no reward, we are extremely unhappy and very stressful and fearful, because we are all aware that without a job there is no other way one will be effective enough in the system of money as it exists now in this world. The word: "job," is nothing but something we use to get the money we were effectively brainwashed to accept as THE only way we can share what is on the planet in order to meet our survival needs.

But the reality is that there is NO sharing going on, there is only business going on, ways of making more and more money, through businesses we are trying, and some successfully too, to accumulate more and more of this thing called money, because more means; we have more saying and more buying power and also more influence in a world where we have accepted and allowed that money have more value than LIFE itself. Those conducted the big businesses have made sure, through laws to keep them as close as possible in being the owners of a particular resource that are being used to transform that into the machinery of making money, making a mockery between the relationships that exist between humans in making usage of the resources that are provided by the earth, as the nature that exists on earth.

                             

We are only looking at how we can make more money. Saving money is just another word for having more money for myself actually in fact. Again nothing to do with supporting LIFE on earth.

Supporting LIFE on earth is like THE most alienated idea people seem to hear when it is shared, because most people interpret life as only their life or the life of the ones close to them.......but not ALL of LIFE. Thus the moment ALL of LIFE is mentioned they will feel a resistance to/towards it, because we were brainwashed to only care about our lives and even that is very superficial too. Thus sharing is something we have been brainwashed NOT to do, even though we were told by our parents to share with others, but the reality of living together is not so as we express through our words. We talk about it, but in the way we deal and give or use our money says something else, namely: "I better hold on to my money, because one never knows when I will be in need of it in times of difficulties, when money is scares." Now this phrase is imprinted into us through the word banks came up with, called: " savings."  They were encouraging people to remember to open saving accounts to save their money in the banks, because the banks themselves then can use it to make profit, without the individual being aware of this.

Having savings seems as a great thing, and it may be so, in this system of lack, or better said: " deliberate created illusion of lack."  But this lack only exists in the money system, not actually in the resources of earth that are here to support us in living as best as possible on the planet. People are starving not necessarily because they do not have food, they are dying of hunger/starving because the means to get to the food is none existent, and that means is: " money."  Some people are without homes in this world, not because the earth is not producing enough resources to built homes with, and us not having enough people that can built homes, oh no.........it is because these people do not have money to be able to pay for a house or housing. The same goes with medicine and water and you name it, all the things that should have been a priority in each human beings life on this planet, a priority that actually should be a given, mimicking what nature is doing, like our bodies itself is doing, always making sure that the whole body is supported equally so that the body can exist as a body, as a whole. Nature is making sure that all of what is here as an expression of this very nature is taking care of, because nature is making sure that all life on earth is supported equally, from the very small up to the very large, all according to their specific design and survival needs, on land and in the oceans, everywhere.

       

But of course we humans believe we are such a special bunch and that we can change these laws of nature and make of nature what we want it to be to fit into our delusions of grandeur, without having an inkling of an idea what we are busy creating that will have an effect/outcome/consequence on life on earth that will be destructive and harmful to lots of expressions including ourselves. even now that the evidences of these are apparent, we still want to continue with the same old system that has injected us into this very moment where the extremity of two outcomes exists, as in us either making  it or not?


Thus, we must first realize and also accept that we are delusional about "needing a job."  When we accept this problem, we can than start to see solutions, because right now, most of the solutions we are trying to bring are all about: "  We need to create jobs for people."  
Acting as if the job that are withering away is why we are where we are, when in reality, it is the laws/rules and regulations supporting a monetary system of inequality IS the problem.
Thus what do we do, we change the laws/rules and regulations of money to support Equality for all!!!



Thanks.


Larry Manuela

Join us at: Desteni

Have a look at Equalmoney the solution to all the problems in this world.

Support our research and buy one or more products that will assist and support you greatly in understanding what is actually going on in life, through;  EQAFE

And do the life course and perfect yourself: DIP

Study another proposal we have, which is:  LIG