Day 248, Positive Findings/Remarks/Feelings regarding attractiveness for a woman/women. Part - 6

So continuing up to the next dimension, which is going to be the Physical/Behavioural-Dimension.

For a little context of the the previous post, i leave a bit of the last part in that post here:

Self-Reward:



Now that i have walked these specific fears, i am now more aware of the patterns i have accepted and allowed within and as myself and thus this give me now a window of opportunity to actually Do something about it, thus this point of '' LIVING SEX'' is what i must get practically as an expression of myself as the human physical body/form. Thus my Reward that i give to myself HERE within this post in relation to this specific Dimension is, that i can see what the fears i have created within and as myself can do in the form of me NOT taking my Self-Responsibility when i have to and able to in a moment and turn everything around as to what will be BEST for me and also for others as me that are in my direct environment.




Problem:



Physical/behavioural-Dimension:

***   itchy scalp

***   can't find a way to sit comfortable

***    i cannot relax my arms and just leave them in a comfortable position, i have to move them constantly trying to find a comfortable way of keeping them






Solutions:




Self-forgiveness statements:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not understand and pay attention to the little changes that happen to my physical body as in, when my scalp itches and i have to scratch it in a moment of being in her presence and that this is an indication that there is something about ME not understanding HER going on within me and the reason being because i am trying to understand  her from the perspective of my mind and not from a perspective of common sense.


I forgive myelf that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT use common sense in critical moments of being HERE, and instead let myself get lost into thoughts and making the understanding long and weary.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that i am not paying attention to my body that is actually HERE and missing myself as manifested LIFE right HERE.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT be able to find a way to sit comfortable when i am in her presence, because of what I think/belief she might think about how i sit, with other words, ME thinking/believing that she is going to judge me on how i behave physically.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not be able to find a way to relax my arms in a comfortable position, and thus have to constantly try to find a comfortable position, just because i want to touch her skin, and choose not to do it within myself, because of what i think/belief she might think about me doing that or what she might think/belief the reason is for me doing that which to my mind will be something that is negative.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge her that she might be negative about me within her own thinking, when meanwhile all of this is my own self-created delusion about her, that has nothing to do with the actuality that is going on in her.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to avoid touching her and feeling uncomfortable wanting to do that, because of my own self-created belief that she might not like it or wanting to be touched.




Self-Commitment statements:


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into scraching my head, i STOP   and i take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE, till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize that i scratch my head in her presence because i am trying to understand her from my mind perspective and not from a common sense perspective.


Thus within this i commit myself to pay attention to when i am in her presence and she is communicating with me and i scratch my head to immediately remind myself to look within myself in that moment as to find out what it is i am NOT understanding common- sensically, and if the opportunity present itself that i can investigate that point in that moment through self-forgiveness i do it and if it not, i take note and then do it later when i am at home by myself and can go through it more deeply.



When and as i see myself going into being uncomfortable within and as my body because of what i think/belief she might be thinking/believing about me, I STOP------ i take a deep breath or many deep breaths till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I realize when in her presence i go into a lot of what she might think/belief about me instead of just being HERE in the moment.

Therefore i commit myself to no matter what to focus on my breath when i am with her and to remind myself constantly to do so and if reactions do come up either positive or negative to forgive them immediately or take notice and do that later when i am alone and can sit alone and dig deeper in a quiet moment with myself.


When and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into finding a comfortable position to place my arms, i STOP------------ i take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy/.


I realize that i am uncomfortable with my arms in her presence because i am in my mind thinking/believing what she might be thinking/believing if i were to touch her and that what she is thinking/believing is NOT at all what is the reason why i want to touch her and that touching her would be seen as something bad to do in that moment.

Thus i commit myself to make sure to when these moments arrive where i see that i am participating in these kind of mind delusions, to take my directive will and direct myself to NOT participate in them and give them attention and focus on my breathing and if when i have done this several time and it still continues every time again i then make sure that i do self-forgiveness about them in that moment or make notes and than do self-forgiveness when i am by myself and can sit more quietly and dig deeper into myself to see what i have missed and have not worked out yet, and thus apply myself accordingly.





Self-Reward:



So, within this post i have seen/realized/understand that my body is giving me some hints when i am partcipating in my mind delusions. Now all i have to do is to be very attentive when these physical behaviours occur to sort it out immediately or if they are not clear yet to me to investigate within me in what exactly i am participating within in my mind.



Thanks.





Larry Manuela

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