Friday, 7 February 2014

Day 283, Memories that triggers the need/want/desire for sex in the relasionship : Part- 8

Now, I am going to write the last Dimension in regard to this particular point.
This Dimension will be, the Consequence-Dimension.



                                                                 


In my previous blog, I come to this conclusion about myself:


Self-Reward:


Within this writing I have found within myself that I have made my body addictive to certain/specific patterns, but yet at the same time I can now use these pattern to identify when I am participating within and as my mind, because the body does not lie, it just follows the input that it has been given, or to put it more correctly, I manipulate through my mind my body to react in certain/specific ways in order to keep my mind going coming up with more thoughts and then to get the experience as if these are real by making the body react to them. Thus now that I am more aware of these, I can use these body behaviours to sort out myself as to what happens within my mind and forgive myself for allowing myself to have such thoughts that affect my body.


So now up to the Consequence-Dimension.


Consequence-Dimension:


***  having to do masturbation based on mind illusions

***  abusing my body to comply to the images/pictures for self-gratification

***  looking for sex with woman just to satisfy my mind desire



Self-Forgiveness & Self-Commitment Statements:



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate so much into my mind that in the end I gave in, into my mind participation and have to look for a point of energy release, which will be masturbation.

When and as I see myselof going into or I am about to go into participate into my mind as to in the end get to the energy release, which is masturbation, to immediately STOP------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back here till I am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize that I am letting myself participate deliberately in the mind in order to get the energy release in the end as what I will find through masturbation, thus making masturbation a tool for my mind projections and a support for my mind addictions.

Therefore, I commit myself to make sure to pay attention to my deliberate participation in my mind to generate certain/specific feelings and emotions that eventually will lead to masturbation on what has been played out within and as my mind consciousness system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse my body to comply to images/pictures in my mind for self-gratification, wherein the self-gratification itself is what is of value and the body where self is getting the gratification from/of is of no importance then to just be the point where I can get self-gratification.

When and as I see myself going into or I am about to go into or I am about to go into abuse my body to comply to the images/pictures in my mind for self-gratification, I STOP-------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back here, till I am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize that I use images/pictures for my self-gratification and abuse my body to produce the necessary energy to in end for my mind to consume the energy that I will experience as a positive energetic experience.

Thus, within this I commit myself to make sure that I place importance in my body as it exist here and what it does here in every moment of breath and make sure that I remind myself to be here within and as my body in order to not get lost within and as my mind and make sure that I do some physical work that support me in just being here breathing, within and as my body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a consequence for myself wherein I will be looking for woman to have sex with just to satisfy my mind desires.

When and as I see myself going into or I am about to go into trying through my mind looking for woman to hve sex with, I STOP------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back here, till I am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I realize that I am deliberately trying to look for woman to have sex with, just because I have made myself addicted to my mind desires and look for ways to satisfy these desires.

Therefore, I commit myself to through my writing of self-forgiveness and my commitment to life to  work out this deliberate mind participation where I sabotage myself as self here and choose to fall for my mind desires, and make commitments to myself I am aware that I can keep.




Self-Reward:

Within this thread I have seen/realized and understood what kind of consequences I have created for myself in regards to this particular point. And how I am using/abusing my body to comply to the mind with its self-created, self-accepted and self-allowed desires. So now that I have worked out the points, it is more clear and simple to spot the patterns when they come up and stop myself in time and not participate, till I will be clear of this particular desire that have consequences for myself that are not what is best for myself nor for others as myself.


Thanks.


Larry Manuela



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