In the second part from that one blog, I finished at the following self-forgiveness statement:
" I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project onto other people my own self-accepted beliefs/ideas/opinions about morality and ethics of treating me as if I don't have money myself to buy own thing, thus that I belief that the person is seeing me as being less fortunate then themselves, thus within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to treat other people because I belief within myself that they are less fortunate then me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a personality within and as myself where I think/belief that I have to go somewhere where a fee is being charged, because I think/belief based on my upbringing that not giving any money is in reality abusing others and profiting from others."
Now with the next self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I do not have money to stay inside the house and avoid coming in contact with other people, because I fear a point where I might be in a position of having to use money, when I don't have it can come up, and so to not go into the embarrassment of all that, I rather stay at home all by myself and avoid as much as possible people contacting me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to avoid answering phone calls, because I fear that the people calling, especially if they are family members and friends, that they might ask to see me or want to invite me to come when all of these are points that will cost money, because maybe at home I don't have much to go by and thus if they come to visit, I will not have something to give/offer them, like a drink or something. Thus within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ashamed of letting someone I know see my situation I am in that is financially not stable and good at all, thus I avoid the contact with all these people.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to receive the help from people that know me or are in my immediate circle, just because I fear they might tell everyone else about my situation of not having money and that they even had to help me. Thus within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe my own projection on other people as myself of believing that they might tell everyone else. Thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to also tell other people close to me if I had helped someone that needed my help, thus because I have done this myself and I am now in the situation where I am the one that can be talked about to other people I judge and project my judgment to/towards those who want to help me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to more easily accept help from an organisation or some other governmental institute because I see the people working there as strangers and that they are just doing their work and they don't really know me, thus that I am just another person and they have no close connection to me or any care to/towards me and thus I do not have to fear being embarrassed and ashamed.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to allow myself to get into a negative energetic experience as emotion, known as sadness, where I just sit there and contemplate on me not having money and feeling sorry for myself not having money.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to get into the experience of thinking and believing that life is hard when in reality I have made myself belief that about life being hard as a manifestation into my life, when in reality it is me allowing myself to follow my believes/ideas/opinions about life, and not seeing/realizing and understanding that it is the survival part I have taken to hardship as how I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within my life and this world, where survival is being interpreted as life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be stressed about not having money when I don't have money, because I have already the experiences of myself and others as myself when having money not being stressed or experiencing any stress.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money not being interested in doing anything neither for myself nor for others as myself, because I have accepted and allowed myself to only move myself wheh I have money, thus that having money directs me instead of me directing me and in so doing directing my money.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to be around or with people that do have money, because I fear that the possibility may exist that I might be having to buy something and then I will be in trouble because I don't have money, and thus be ashamed in the moment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only question the existence of money more when I don't have money, because it is in that moment that all the practical points of not having money and having to live in a situation of not having money or very little money will press, thus making me react to not having money. Thus within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to based my questioning of the existence of money on a reaction to/towards money, thus meaning; I will only question something when I have a reaction to/towards it and within this not standing within and as the point itself and questioning it from the perspective of common sense and what is best for all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to have lots of fantasies envolving me winning great money-prizes, without seeing/realizing and understanding that I am in fact letting myself be sabotaged to move myself and find practical solutions that are realistic within my reality to my money problem.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money, to only then really pay attention to prices of products and services and see then that they are expensive, just because I have accepted and allowed myself to when I have money I just buy stuff without really paying attention to the prices just because I have the money in that moment and I feel like I have a lot of money, when I am aware that I am not a rich man.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to see/interpret and perceive the days to feel longer, because I don't move myself and do something that is practical, I just sit there and don't do nothing but thinking about not having money and how I am going to get money now.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to not take good care of my human physical body, because I then try to avoid spending money on food and stuff like that or avoid spending money on things that may make things worst in the very near future.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I don't have money to belief that I am bumping into people that also don't have money or have little money, without seeing/realizing and understanding that most people are now in financial difficulty, but yet I made of the situation a point of finding a way to justify me not having money and finding a way of avoiding myself feeling alone all by myself having similar problems as the others as myself, thus by sharing our problems with each other I feel a sense of belonging to the group and I am not so alone within the problem of not having money or having not enough money.
More will come in the next post.................................
Thanks.
Larry Manuela
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