Friday 3 May 2013

Day 236, Contemplating for Contemplation Sake or Not? Part 2

So here i am continuing with the next Dimension to work out.


Within this one blog i will take on the Fear-Dimension.


For a little bit context from what i have done yesterday, here is a little bit of it:









Self-Reward:



Within this dimension i have seen that i am using images to divert myself for NOT taking my Self-responsibility to what i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become within and as this world, and therefore now that i have seen the why i am doing this, when it happens again i can STOP myself in doing so, because i already have identified the reason why i am doing it, and IF it continues to pop-up it means i still have to digg deeper within myself to see what point i have missed with regards to this whole point or this particular dimension.









Problem:




Fear-Dimension:


*** Fear of throwing away ''my upbringing/my culture''

*** Fear of having to act against what i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become as a product of '' my upbringing/my culture''


*** Fear of making a mistake and feeling less then someone else.


*** Fear of being corrected and also rejected








Solutions:




Self-forgiveness statements:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear throwing away ''my upbringing/my culture'' as IF these are what I am in fact, when in reality all these are,are believes/concepts i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become, and then live according to these. Thus within this i realize that i am living according to believes/concepts that were imposed upon me without me ever questioning them. Therefore, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT question my own believes/concepts in regards to my living practical application.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to never see/realize/understand that i am living according to and by believes and that LIFE is NOT a belief, LIFE is real, but yet i don't live LIFE as real, i have traded LIFE that is Real for that which is an illusion as that which are Believes and concepts, which are memories within and as my Mind CONsciousness System.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to trust my believes and concepts above LIFE, so much so, that i don't trust what LIFE in fact is HERE at all, hence i then don't take my Self-Responsibility to/towards all of LIFE.



I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that The only Trust that will always be valid is the Trust in LIFE itself and no other trust will be valid or more or whatever.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear having to act against what i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become as a product of ''my upbringing/my culture.''


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to think/belief that acting against what i term: '' my upbringing/my culture,'' is something bad/wrong/negative and also disrespectful.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to Link ''my upbringing/my culture,'' to something that is bad/wrong/negative and direspectful.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear loosing what i term: '' my upbringing/my culture,'' because i have accepted and allowed it to be what is worthy to me in order for me to survive within this world system that is currently in place.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to only see what is worthy in how i can survive within this system of separation and inequality.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that by accepting and allowing ''my upbringing/my culture,'' i am in fact accepting and allowing what is HERE as we live NOW within this world, this reality, a reality where LIFE is abused in every way.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear making a mistake and feeling less then someone else, because i made a mistake.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see/interpret/view making an mistake as something to be feared, instead of seeing/realizing/understanding that what i term mistakes are the things i haven't understood yet in LIFE, thus my living.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to Link ''feeling less then someone else,'' to making mistakes, thus by making a mistake i am suddenly less then someone else. I realize that this is due to the indoctrination from my environment as in being able to win in competition makes me Fear making mistakes, because in competition, making a mistake means; 'i am a looser.' Thus within this, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to participate within competition with its winning and loosing, and wherein making a mistake will mean i am a looser.



I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear being corrected and rejected by someone else.


I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that this fear of being Corrected/Rejected is in fact me NOT wanting to face my own limitation, which can be shown by another or in another IF they are to correct me or reject me. I realize that instead of me correcting myself when i am shown through another that i am incorrect or another reject me, i choose to protect this Fear by holding on to it within and as myself as my mind consciousness system. Therefore, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to protect my own fear by holding on to it, and thus fearing my own fear.





Self-Commitment statements:



I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into believes/concepts in regards to ''my upbringing/my culture,'' I STOP--------------------Take a deep breath bring myself back HERE and make sure i continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, as i have already seen within my SFS that my believes/concepts are NOT what LIFE is, thus i STOP participating in them.


I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into living my LIFE as a belief/concept, I immediately STOP----------------take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and then from this starting point of clarity and stability i communicate and take action, absent from believes/concepts.



I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into Trusting my believes/concepts, I immediately STOP participating in them through making sure i take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and then from this starting point of clarity and stability i then move/walk/communicate/interact/take action.



I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into NOT trusting me as within and as my own Breath, and place trust within my believes/concepts within my Mind CONsciousness System, I immediately STOP-------------Take a deep breath and make sure i continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and then within and as this clarity and stability as being one and equal within and as my Breath, i put my trust therein, then i am certain that my trust is Self-trust as within my breath which is the Breath Of LIFE.


I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into Fearing acting against my own self-created believes/concepts in what i term ''my upbringing/my culture,'' I STOP---------------take a deep breath and make sure i continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, and then from this clarity and stability i can Direct myself according to my will as the will that exists within myself as the Breath Of LIFE, HERE.



I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into what i see/view/perceive as ''my upbringing/my culture'' as something that is ''bad/wrong/negative,'' i STOP----------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and then from this starting point i communicate and interact.


I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into fearing making a mistake, I STOP------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and i realize that this fear of making a mistake is actually a point within myself that i have to work on and then out in order to free myself as this fear within myself as this mind consciousness sytem.


I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into feeling less then someone else to immediately STOP and take a deep breath and do not praticipate in such a feeling and make sure i continue to focus on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and then when i am clear and stable within/as my breath i can direct myself in communicating/interacting with another without having to be engulfed within feelings, and just be HERE within and as my breath.


I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into fearing being corrected/rejected, I immediately STOP-------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE and remind myself that this particular fear is to protect myself within and as my own fear, thus i continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and then from this starting point of clarity and stabilty i communicate and interact within another.




Self-Reward:



I see within this writing that i am trying to protect my Self-interest in the form of/as '' my upbringing/my culture'' in order to NOT have to face what these '' my upbringing/ my culture'' have as consequences within my own LIFE and also LIFE of others that i will interact with or communicate with. Therefore now that i can see this, i can gift myself the gift to pay attention to my words and to look at what reaction comes up within me where there is an indication that i might be proptecting these believes/concepts within myself to then immediately stop participating in them and IF they do NOT stop, i will make sure i continue digging to find the core of this fear, till i root it out completely within and as myself.






Thanks.



Larry Manuela.





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