Sunday, 5 May 2013

Day 237, Contemplating for Contemplation Sake or Not? Part 3

Now continuing to the next dimension.

In this post i will take on the Imagination Dimension.








Now, before i start on this journey of working out this dimension, i leave a little bit of what i wrote in the previous post here:



Self-Reward:



see within this writing that i am trying to protect my Self-interest in the form of/as '' my upbringing/my culture'' in order to NOT have to face what these '' my upbringing/ my culture'' have as consequences within my own LIFE and also LIFE of others that i will interact with or communicate with. Therefore now that i can see this, i can gift myself the gift to pay attention to my words and to look at what reaction comes up within me where there is an indication that i might be proptecting these believes/concepts within myself to then immediately stop participating in them and IF they do NOT stop, i will make sure i continue digging to find the core of this fear, till i root it out completely within and as myself.




Problem:


Imagination-Dimension:


*** imagining myself using her stuff in my own way, but then her not liking me using it in my own way, because it interferes with her own way of using her own stuff.

*** imagining leaving her stuff behind like she wouldn't like it, and then have to hear from her that she doesn't like it the way i left it behind


*** imagining going into her fridge to get something to eat, but not knowing what to eat, because maybe the thing i want to eat and if there is enough of it is just for one person, thus i can't eat it, it is hers, and if i eat it, i then ate what she liked, and then i will feel bad about myself that i have eaten the last piece of what she liked.


*** imagining using the wrong cooking pan to cook something with, because she maybe/possibly use it for cooking but only cooks certain/specific foods with it, and NOT what i may be intending to cook with it.






Solutions:




Self-forgiveness statements:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagining myself using her stuff in my own way which in turn will interfere with her own way of using her own stuff, which within myself i see as a point ofconflict/friction, thus i avoid using her stuff and just wait at specific times or oportunities to make sure that when i use her stuff it will be in the ''right'' way, thus the way that she might approve it is the ''right'' way to use her own stuff.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to place my own judgement on what she will like or not like instead of focusing on, if what i will do will be BEST for me and for her when in this specific point of using her stuff.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let myself give in, into my fear of maybe/possibly getting into conflict/friction IF i am to use her stuff in a way that she will NOT approve.



I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear Conflict/Friction and due to this fear avoid possible scenario's where Conflict/Friction can derive from it, and just play it safe.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to play it safe to avoid Conflict/friction, when in this case these Conflict/Frictions if they were to appear will only show me the whom i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become that is NOT the being that roam the earth as this Human Physical Form/Body, but just an entity of my own making in my mind.



I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself leaving her stuff behind like she wouldn't like it and then have to hear from her that she didn't like it, like i left it behind, confirming in this way that i fear being found faulty, or fear having to NOT do something right as in being incapacitated.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the fears of '' being found faulty/NOT being able to do something right/being incapacitated,'' to exist within me as me as the mind as energy and that then controls my own decision making in how to move and act in a moment, wherein i will choose to better NOT to take action.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to link ''taking action'' to the fears of: '' being found faulty/NOT being able to do something right/being incapacitated,'' to take hold of me and thus influence my decision making in a moment to move myself and take action.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself going into her fridge to get something to eat, but not knowing what to eat, because maybe the thing i want to eat and if there is enough of it is just for one person, thus i can't eat it, it is hers, and if i eat it, i then ate what she liked, and then i will feel bad about myself that i have eaten the last piece of what she liked.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have this imagination of eating what i think/belief might be her last piece of whatever that she have left, just because i have the ''what if?'' attached to it, and this is: '' what if it is the last piece of food that she can buy for this week, or what if she doesn't have more money for food for the rest of the week to come and i eat this last piece?


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to due to my own Self-judgement within myself have made me make the decision to better NOT go there, because i might interfere with her survival, in this case the food she buy for herself to eat.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have this imagination( myself going into her fridge to get something to eat, but not knowing what to eat, because maybe the thing i want to eat and if there is enough of it is just for one person, thus i can't eat it, it is hers, and if i eat it, i then ate what she liked, and then i will feel bad about myself that i have eaten the last piece of what she liked,) existing within me when i in reality did not even went into her fridge at all.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to avoid going into her fridge just because i have accepted and allowed a belief system related to ''my upbringing/my culture'' to stand in the way, where i only see all the ''negative outcomes'' that can derive from such involvement or such action.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use my superimposed belief system as ''my upbringing/my culture,'' to avoid ''the negative'' at all times and look only for '' the positive'' at all times, because of the acceptances and allowances that ''the positive'' will lead to ''good deeds.''


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine using the wrong cooking pan to cook something with, because of what i think/belief that she might be using it for cooking, but cooking for only certain/specific foods only, and NOT what i may be intent to cook with it.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have this comparisson within my mind existing of her using her cooking pan for only certain/specific food, because i have been through that myself where people will use some of their cooking pans they have for only to cook certain/specific foods and do NOT like it at all IF someone were to cook what is NOT to be cooked within this pan that they have decided that they are going to cook only certain/specific foods with.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to based my whole reality in a moment of living HERE to a memory within and as my mind, that is only focused on a ''negative outcome.'' 


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to even rely on my memories instead of me BEING HERE within and as my Breath and my Human Physical Body/Form as one as equal as LIFE.


I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that to live according to memories within me, is me living according to the past and not Living as LIFE HERE.


I forgive myself that have accepted and allowed myself to trade in LIFE HERE, for memories within and as my mind.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to put value within and as my mind as the possible outcomes that i see within my mind as the memories of ''possible negative outcomes'' that exist within me as me as the mind as energy and choose them instead of Living HERE within and as my Breath and my Human Physical Body/Form.




Self-commitment statements:



I realize that i avoid using her stuff and just wait at specific times or oportunities to make sure that when i use her stuff it will be in the ''right'' way, thus the way that she might approve it is the ''right'' way to use her own stuff, thus within this i Commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into attempting to use her stuff, because of my own self-created believes within and as myself as my mind CONsciousness system, I STOP--------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE and make sure i Remain HERE within and as my breath focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, and then out of this clarity and stability i move or take action and IF it is something i just don't know how to use it or if it is o.k. to use it, i just ask her.


I realize that i focus on what she might like or not like instead of me being HERE focusing on me being HERE and doing what will be BEST for me and and then also for, because eventually it is her stuff that i am about to use, thus within this i commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into focusing what she might or might not like about using her stuff, I STOP------------------------ take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE and make sure i focus on my breathing and remind myself that this what i am participating in, is just a mind-fuck, that it is NOT what is HERE, and thus i do NOT participate in what is NOT HERE as physically manifested as being REAL, and continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, and then from this clarity and stability i then move or take action that will be coming from me being HERE within and as my Breath and my Human physical Body/Form, one and equal.


I realize that i play it safe where i see that a possibility for Conflict/Friction scenario can derive out of it from the point of view of my Mind CONsciousness System in relation to what i have accepted and allowed to be there as Memories within and as it, therefore I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into using my memories to play it safe within a moment to avoid Conflict/friction based on what i see/perceive/view/interpret within and as my Mind CONsciousness System, I immediately STOP,------------------ take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE and make sure i focus on my breathing till i am clear and stable from any energy movemen within me, and then from this clarity and stability of NO energy movement i move/walk/take action as me just being HERE within and as my Human Physical Body/Form.


I realize that i have created an Entity within myself that i accepted and allowed to make decisions on my behalf in accordance to what this Entity interpret as what could be Conflict/Friction IF i were to engage within the action/movement related to past memories of what went Wrong/bad in similar scenarios, thus within this I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into comparissons within my Mind CONsciousness System with the memories placed there, I STOP--------------------- take a deep breath and make sure i focus on my breathing and do NOT let myself get carried away within and as my Mind CONsciousness System with its memories and make sure that my attention is focused on my breathing and my Human Physical Body/Form and to make sure i hold my hands together to remind me that i am HERE and then when i am clear and stable and can then move and take action(s) out of this clarity and stability.


I realize that based on my reasoning and findings within myself as my Mind CONsciousness System as the Memories that exists within it as me as energy, i make decisions, thus I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into making decisions based on what is existent within me as memories, I STOP--------------- take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as Energy and then from this point of clarity and stability i make my decision that will be a decision based on my Self-Will and my Self-directiveness.



I realize that based on my own Self-judgement i avoid doing something, in this case avoiding going in her fridge, to choose what i can eat, just because i think/belief that what i might want to eat and IF i find that only very little is left and i eat it, then i ate her very last piece and that to me is NOT a good thing to do, so within this I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into avoidance of doing something or taking an action in this case in regards to her food that she have brought for herself, i just Ask her if it is o.k. or not, and that is it, instead of letting myself being a slave of my own memories of apparent Conflict/Friction that can maybe/possibly come into being, thus i make sure that i do NOT participate and give attention IF these imaginations were to pop-up within me and make sure i focus on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, and then out of this clarity and stability i move/walk/take action and do What will be BEST in that particular moment or instant.


I realize that due to my acceptance and allowance of ''my upbringing/my culture,'' i only see the outcomes within my mind as what can go wrong, and thus making the same choice over and over always to make sure that what i interpret within my mind as a ''negative outcome,'' is always to be avoided, for i DO NOT want/wish an ''negative outcome.'' Thus within this, I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into making decisions link to ''my upbringing/my culture,'' to immediately STOP------------------ take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE within and as my Breath and my Human Physical Body/Form, and focus on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, and then out of this clarity and stability I move and take action and make a decision, that will be BEST, and to make sure that the decision i make is really what is BEST, i ask her what is her perspective on the decision, because i can make a decision, but it doesn't necessarily mean that it will also be what is BEST for her too, and IF it is NOT the BEST the decision, then we can workout an agreement on what will be BEST for both of us in regards to this particular point.


I realize that due to my accepted and allowed superimposed belief system imprinted within me, I tend to look only at things within my LIFE that can lead to an Positive Outcome, according to what my Mind CONsciousness System interpret/see/view as ''Positive,'' because in my Mind CONsciousness System that which is ''Positive'' can lead to that which is ''good deeds.'' Thus within this I commit myself to when and as in see myself going into or i am about to go into having interpretations/views/what i see according to my Mind CONsciousness System, I STOP------------------------------ take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE and make sure i focus on my breathing and don't let myself be fooled by placing my attention to/towards what is within my Mind CONsciousness System as Memories, as the Past, and a Past that is a LIE too, because with all the Positive in this world, still the Negative is HERE and is the MOST obvious and the one that is the reason why the other is being seeked and believed, thus i keep on focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and then from this clarity and stability I move and take action devoid of energy fluctuations within myself as myself as the mind as energy.


I realize that i let my decision making be influenced by a simple thing like: '' what to cook in a cooking pan,'' just because of what i have as memories within me, either from my own or of what i have seen, that turned out to have an Negative outcome. Thus within this I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into letting myself be controlled by my own memories with its ''Negative outcome,'' I just STOP my participation in it and make sure i take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE, till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and then from this clarity and stability, i then move and take action, devoided/absent of/from past memories full of Negative outcomes.




Self-Reward:


Within this blog i have seen/realized/understood that i am using my imagination linked to memories that are functioning as protection of ''my upbringing/my culture'' and thus i make sure that i do NOT make choices that will compromise this Belief-System within and as myself. Thus hereby now that i see what i accept and allow within and as myself i am now able to STOP my participation when similar situation will come up again, so i can then gift myself the gift to stop myself in participating and correct myself in that moment, instead of trying to keep on holding on to a Superimposed BeLIEf-System that have nothing to do with Reality at all.






Thanks.



Larry Manuela




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