Here is where i left off, in my earlier post:
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or about to go into the backchat: '' i have to find another way to mix within dealing with people,'' I STOP, take a deep breath and bring myself back here till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into blaming the outside world to STOP and take a deep breath till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
Problem:
Imagination Dimension:
** Imagining myself winning a fight
** imagining how i could outsmart my opponent in all possible scenarios
** imagining myself winning the fight, before even engaging in the fight
** imagining myself as being all powerful and uncontrollable by anyone
** imagining myself getting hurt in the process of a fight
Solution
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself winning a fight as this imagination is then a projection of imbedded memories within me that always seek for me to be the winner.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let competition be part of me as me as the mind as energy, and as far as to come up with mostly winning possible scenarios involving myself as a main character/personality that as of right now still, i haven't found and stand as one as equal to yet, to see the real ME as i talk/interpret/see/define myself.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that the imaginations i have regarding myself are all not real, because they are not taking place HERE and are not physically HERE manifest, thus not part of the physical reality as it exist right HERE, right now.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let myself get dragged within and as my imagination giving them full reign to exist within me as me and even to the extent to influence my human physical body to move and behave in certain way and mannerism that will lead to a possible self-interested outcome.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that to have a want/desire/need as an self-interest outcome is the very fact of me existing as the character/personality as it too exists within and as the realm of the mind.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to live as a self-interest character/personality that uses all kinds of matters of justifications and judgements as to protect its existence within and as the mind as an energetic entity.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine within myself all possible scenarios and outcomes that can lead to me outsmarting my opponent.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to want/need/desire to outsmart my opponent because of me wanting to win and fearing loosing.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to want/desire/need to win from my opponent because within me i already have the memory of this making me feel good about myself and also making me have a certain/specific feeling of power over another, which in this case is my opponent.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let a memory of ''feeling good about myself'' to exist witin me as me as the mind as energy in order for me to use it to entertain and keep in place the character/personality that holds and exist as a self-interest charater/personality within me as me as the mind as energy.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed msyelf to let a memory exist within me as me as the mind as energy that is holding on to a specific fear that is the fear of loosing, because loosing would mean various things, like; ' being ashamed, being emotionally hurt, being physically hurt,' and thus in order to not go through these awared possible consequences, i use the fear of loosing as an alarm to alert myself that will go off everytime to avoid running into these consequences, and thus never ever coming face to face with the character/personality behind it all.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagining myself winning the fight before even engaging in the fight, wherein i am thus preparing myself energetically to boost my energy pockets that exists within me as me as this self-interest character/personality to aquire/consume more energy to keep itself as me as the mind as energy existent and apparently alive.
I forgive msyelf that i have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see/realize/understand that the very reason/purpose that I am wanting/wishing/desiring to keep this character/personality alive and existent within me as me, is because of me seeing/interpreting/viewing/defining myself as such and thus thinking/believing that this is the REAL me, when all that is being shown, is time and time again that it is in need of trigger-points in order to have an inkling of an apparent existence. Thus within this i realize that in order for me to be this character/personality that i think/belief i am, i must participate into and as energetic trigger-points, that need to be generated first and then produced for they don't exist constantly and consistently within me as me as the whom i think/belief i am as this character/personality.
I forgive msyelf that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself being all powerful and uncontrollable by anyone, because this belief supports the generating of energy within my body that will be consumed/sukced in order for me as this character/personality to continue existing as the self-interest character/personality whom i belief/think that i am in this world, in this reality.
I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand the extent of me believing/thinking that a particular character/personality is the whom i am, making myself absolutely delusional for i am aware that whatever i think/belief, and feel energetically is NOT HERE as the physical reality as what my body consists of and exists as, and that my own proof is that i have to make myself belief that i am this character/personality otherwise it does NOT exist.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let an imagination exists within me as me as the mind as energy that is projecting myself as this mind entity as the self-interest character/personality getting hurt in a fight, when in physical real world/reality there is NOT even a fight going on at all. I realize that i use this imagination of getting hurt not so much as to prevent getting hurt, but in fact as a preparation as being on the lookout and sharpness for when the opportunity does present itself, i am then already charged with sufficient energy to wake up the fear that will make me act in ways as to protect my survival as this self-interest character/personality at all costs.
Thus within this, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed msyelf to blind myself with my own self-created beliefs about myself to make sure i can protect myself as this self-interest character/personality using the imagination of getting hurt.
Self-commitment statements:
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into imagining or about to go into imagining myself winning a fight to immediately STOP, Take a deep breath and make sure i continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or about to go into imagining myself involved in possible winning scenarios to suit my main character/personality, I STOP, take a deep breath and make sure i continue breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, and then within this clearness and stability i walk, and i move myself in complete directiveness.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or about to go into loosing myself into imagination that i am aware now that they are not real at all, i just STOP myself within participation within them and make sure i focus on my breathing and do NOT give the imagination attention and continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the energy as the mind.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into letting myself get dragged into imaginations that can lead my human physical body to act in certain way and/or mannerism that will have a self-interest outcome, I immediately STOP, take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE, and make sure i continue breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into wanting/needing/desiring to have an self-interest outcome to immediately STOP, and take a deep breath or many deep breaths till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy so i can remain in the silence of my breath and the movement of my physical human form and then act out of this clearness and stability.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into letting myself as a self-interest character/personality to justify and judge within me in order to protect its own survival, I just immediately STOP, take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE, till i am clear and stable within and as my breathing and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into imagining all sorts of possible scenarios and outcomes that can lead to outsmarting my opponent, I immediately STOP my participation within such imagination and take and deep breath and make sure i continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into wanting/needing/desiring wating to win and fearing to loose, i immediately STOP, take a deep breath and make sure i do not participate in such wants/needs/desires till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into making myself feel good about myself and having power over another because of wanting/needing/desiring to win, I immediately STOP, take a deep breath and bring myseklf back HERE and make sure i am touching something that is physically HERE, so i don't loose myself within and as my mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself holding on to this memory as ''feeling good about myself'' that holds and maintain and protect the self-interest character/personality, I immediately STOP, take a deep breath and focus on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into using my imagination with the ''fear of loosing'' to avoid facing myself as the probable outcomes that can derived if i would not be using this ''fear of loosing'' imagination, thus avoiding confronting/facing myself as this self-interest character/personality.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into imagining myself engaging into a fight before even actually being in a fight just in order for me to prepare myself to boost more energy in order for me as it as the self-interest character/personality to continue existing, i immediately STOP, take a deep breath and make sure i do not let myself participate into imagination and continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into seeing/viewing/interpeting/defining myself as this self-interest character/personality in order to keep existing as IF it is alive and real, I STOP, take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into imagining myself to be all powerful and uncontrollable,because it sustains the self-interest character/personality i think/belief i am with energy, I immediately STOP, take a deep breath and continue focusing on my breathing and not giving attention to my imagination till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into trying to make myself belief that i am this self-interest character/personality in order for it to have a validity and a apparent life, i immediately STOP, take a deep breath and continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, so i can see/realize/understand whom i am as the human physical body one and equal.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into using my imagination to project myself as getting into a fight just to have sufficient energy to immediately get into fear in order to protect myself as this self-interest character/personality for its own survival.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into using the imagination of getting hurt to protect myself as this self-interest character/personality, I immediately STOP, take a deep breath and continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
Reward:
Thus within this i have seen/realized/understood how i'm through my imagination holding on to my self-interest character/personality, keeping it intact within and as my mind as energy. Thus now that i'm aware of this i can then give myself the power to STOP myself in creating myself as such all the time as letting myself participate within all the patterns that constitute the holding intact of the character/personality, thus which is then my reward i have given to myself, as to recognize the whom i am as this character/personality and can then stop me as being/creating myself as it.
Thanks.
Larry Manuela
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