Tuesday 26 February 2013

Day 214, A Moment Of Fear.

Problem:


Today at work, i made a mistake, by proceeding to work when the quality test was not really o.k.
I knew it was not o.k. but because i had to call upon the quality controller after awhile i just forgot and kept on letting the machine running. When the quality controller came he took a few more tests and he said that i need to change the perforation-blade to one that have a lower value so i can also get to a lower value. When my shift-supervisor came to see what was going on, why the machine was not running, i told him and he told me that i should have called the quality controller and that now all the products i made have to be on hold, this means that they are going to have to call the client if they want the product still or not. When he told me this i went to a slight movement  of energy within me, because i knew i made a mistake, and in my mind i was having the back-chat:'' you see, i told you to stop the damn machine and change the fucking blade, but nooooo we have to continue and now what..?? ''




                                                                          



Solution:


Self-forgiveness statements:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let doubt have a grip on me and because of this created an immediate consequence for myself and others as myself at work, because of not stopping the machine and change the blades when i knew i had to.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to take a decision based on knowledge within my mind trying to justify in my own mind that i can continue a little more before i go and get the quality controller guy, when in my practical way of working with my body with the machine was telling something else, and because of this created a friction/conflict within me that came out as doubt.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to experience a movement as energy, like an nerveseness within me when i was told that i need to change the blade now, because in that moment, i knew that that was what i needed to do in the beginning already but didn't, and that i am now in trouble.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go through a little experience of fear when my shift-supervisor told me that all the products that i have made need to go on hold now, and ''going on hold'' even though i didn't know what that realy meant in terms of production, but i perceive it to be something that have negative outcomes. Thus within this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to connect the words: '' go on hold'' to negative energy.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to to have the backchat: '' you see, i told you to stop the damn machine and change the fucking blade, but nooooo we have to continue and now what..?? '' to exist within me as me as the mind as energy.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use the backchat:'' you see, i told you to stop the damn machine and change the fucking blade, but nooooo we have to continue and now what..?? '' as a way to blame myself. Within this i realize that even in these little moments my mind play tricks on me still, because even though the blame, thus what i am saying in my mind is right according to my mind perspective/view, but the ''blaming'' itself is what is NOT what is BEST for myself, because eventually in the end, i blamed my body, because it is my body that is doing the actual physical task and not my mind, thus my mind is seeing itself as more then the body and blaming it and acting as if the body is stupid, when in reality the body was aware what it was doing and even gave the indication/hints when i was uncomfortable within myself, but eventually i took the decision to continue running the machine,and that decision was NOT the body's decision, but my mind's decision---------- forcing the body to continue working when the body was aware that something was wrong.


I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand and hear my body when my body was giving me the indication/hints of uncomfortableness within my chest area and my breathing became short and undeep, that something was wrong, that i was taking decision that my body itself was against. Thus i realize this day, for REAL and in FACT that it is my body that learns and NOT my mind. Thus within this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to always have believed that it is the mind that learns, when all these times it was and IS the body that learns IN fact..!!




Reward.


Self-commitment statements:


I commit myself to whenever i am about to go into or i am takoing decision based on my mind interpretation of physical tasks, i STOP, take a deep breath and bring myself back here within/as the human physical body till i am clear and stable and then out from this clarity and stability within and as myself i then express myself as the human physical body that i am, the real being of planet earth.


I commit myself to pay very close attention to my body indications, and to not loose myself within and as my mind as knowledge and information, and whenever i see myself going into this, or i am participating in it, i immediately STOP, take a deep breath and continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, so that i am just here as the human physical body breathing, living.


I commit myself to whenever i see myself going into or i am about to go into reactions of uncomfortableness, i just STOP and take a deep breath till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and then in this clarity and stability i then  move and act as the human physical body one and equal.


I commit myself to be very watchful to the energetic movements that happen within me whenever there are points that trigger my mind, that will result in fear, and when these happen to immediately STOP, take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE and continue breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.


I commit myself to whenever i see myself going into or i am about to go into backchatting myself away in my mind to immediately STOP and take a deep breath and don't allow myself to fall into this trap as backchat of/as my mind, and continue breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.

I commit myself to in the future to be more vigilant in hearing my body and be watchful to its indications/hints, thus whenever i have a movement as energy within me, even though i may not know why it is moving, i just immediately STOP participation in it and take a deep breath or many deep breaths till i am clear and stable and in this matter i can then see why it is i am having an energetic movement within me as me as the mind as energy.


I commit myself to now that i have realized what i was told lots of times that the body is the real being that learns and not the mind, to be very watchful and careful in aligning myself to be one and equal with and as my body, and little by little move myself from the trap of my mind, till i am the directive principle of my mind, and i live and express as my body, the real of planet earth.



Thanks.


Larry Manuela




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