For more context, from what i wrote a day before, here is a little excerpt:
Self-Reward:
I can see now that i am fearing exposing myself in order to not get rid of what i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become as a mind consciousness system, thus now that i can see myself within my writing i then will be more vigilant and attentive in other similar moments/circumstances when these arive/present themselves, in order to little by little move myself out of this pattern and also to STOP myself from being like this, till i move myself as myself as my directive WILL, within the principle of Oneness and Equality, that which is BEST for all LIFE.
Problem:
Imagination-dimension:
*** Imaginging saying what i have to say, and then due to that getting into conflict/friction with her, just because i exposed myself.
*** Imagining myself being very annoyed/bothersome with expressing myself as the mind consciousness system with myself or with another due to the fear of Maybe/possibly having to work on it.
*** Imaging the other also going through the experiences of being annoyed and/or being bothered by what i have to say.
Solutions:
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine saying what i have to say to her, because i belief that by saying/sharing myself to her, i will be getting into conflict/friction with her, just because i exposed myself as the mind consciousness system, something i need to stop and correct within myself and that i need to see for myself in words and actions first, before i can stop myself as this LIE that i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become wherein i am completely unaware as the whom i am as LIFE, as the human physical body/form and as my breath of LIFE in every moment.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to think/belief that i really NEED to see myself in words and action First, when in reality i can see all of this if i pause and stay within and as my breath, and just be HERE so i don't communicate words of separation to SELF as myself and others as myself.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use words in separation to myself as SELF as LIFE, and therefore create an outcome that is NOT best for all.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine being annoyed/bothersome with myself to share myself as the mind consciousness system that i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become with another as myself, as i fear having to maybe/possibly having to work on it as myself as what i have become.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use my imagination as to see something annoying/bothersome as a way to try and see how i can avoid working on myself, because i know within me that this means that i have to change me.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to Fear changing me, because changing me means according to myself as a mind consciousness system that I won't exist anymore, as the various of stages of what i have been is not here anymore. Thus within this i realize that i fear that which is as me as a system as a memory within my mind consciousness system, without seeing/realizing/understanding that Me as the human physical form as an expression of LIFE has always and is still HERE. Thus i Forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to FEAR to Be HERE.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to imagine another as myself also maybe/possibly going through the same experiences of being annoyed/bothersome if i am to say what i have to say as me exposing myself as the mind consciousness system.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to link imagination to fear of not exposing myself as a mind consciousness system.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to even have an imagination about another as myself being annoyed/bothersome, just because i am annoyed/bothersome within myself with my own thoughts.
Self-commitment statements:
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into believing that sharing myself with/to her i will be getting into conflict/friction, when this all part of myself imagining stuff that are not even happening at all in the moment, To STOP, take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE, till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and from this clarity andstability i communicate to her in a way that will be BEST for both of us, thus taking my directive will and direct myself in a way where i can communicate better to what is really happening within myself and so i can deal with the fear of exposing myself in order to get rid of the self that i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become as a LIE.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into trying to create a need within myself that i need to see myself as in the words and actions first, which when one is not constantly and consistently in Breath is not possible to do this, and thus i immediately STOP, take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE, and continue focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and from this starting point I then Speak, use words as myself right HERE in breath one and equal.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into using words in separation to mySELF, i STOP-----------take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE and focus on my breathing till i am clear and stable and grounded and within this clarity and stability i then use words as myself within my breath one and equal.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into using my imagination based on what i myself experience within myself and by believing that using this imagination avoid me from having to facing myself as the mind consciousness system, I STOP------------take a deep breath and Earth myself back HERE and hold my hands together to remind myself that i am HERE and also to keep on focusing at the same time within/as my breath till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy and from this starting point i then act/move/communicate with another as myself.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into Fearing myself because i am about to stop and change myself, I STOP-----------take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, and i continue breathing and focusing on my breathing till i am clear and stable and no fear exists within me as me as the mind as energy, and i am totally clear i then act/move/communicate.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into imaging others as myself maybe/possibly going through the same experiences as i do, when this is an assumption and a belief, I STOP-----------------take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy.
I commit myself to when and as i see myself going into or i am about to go into linking imagination to fear or to better yet strengthen the fear within myself, I STOP-------take a deep breath and bring myself back HERE till i am clear and stable and nothing moves within me as me as the mind as energy, and then i can communicate with another as myself within and as my breath and my human phsysical body/form, one and equal.
Self-Reward:
within this i gift myself the gift of using my imagination to NOT sabotage myself and/or strengthen my own self-created fear of exposing myself, but to actually use it to See/realize/understand myself as the whom i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become in this world in a moment, so that in these moments i can then STOP myself and correct myself to function effectively in communication and within the principle of what is BEST for all.
Thanks.
Larry Manuela
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