Saturday, 28 April 2012

Day 15, reactions from noises of kids

I was at my sisters house today because she had her birthday 2 days ago, but wanted me to be there today just for the fun and dancing and having fun.
I noticed that the children that were there making all kinds of noise during certain moments work on my nerves, and they run and hit each other make a total mess all over the place, crying all the time because some of them hit each other, they were just pure hyperactive beyond imagination, and not just 1, but 4 of them totally out of control.

I see that i have to put myself in situations where i can work on my reactions towards kids, because as of right now, it's like i don't want to have nothing to do with no kids, especially if they are super hyperactive. I like kids, but kids that do '' normal kid stuff'' but when they don't listen anymore and are just out of control i don't like them.

Self-forgiveness:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to react because of the tremendous noise that the kids were busy making and also the mess that they were busy accumulating all over the place.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself for getting impatient with the the kids making lots of noise.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to connect being impatient, with making a lot of noise.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge the kids,due to them making a lot of noise and within this, not liking them.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself reacting in anger within me, when the noise was just to much.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be judge kids that are quiet as good and kids that are very hyperactive as bad.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that kids are really unaware of what they do, they don't have any understanding as in taking responsibilities for their actions.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see kids as of right now not people that i would like to be with in a group.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to breathe through my reactions, i was quiet outside but inside i wanted to leave that place.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to connect noise with anger within and as me.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to ''feeling'' disgust with children when they are not listening and being very hyperactive. 


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge the parents within me, for finding them not being as effective in teaching the children to be more less active as in hyperactive.



I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to experience blame to/towards the parents,based on the way the children were behaving.







I Commit myself to not judge children, because just like me they to are mind personalities playing their part in this world, so i have to be humble and learn to have patience with them.


I commit myself to not to judge the parents for they to are pre-programed mind personalities playing a program out.


I commit myself to find it within me to find new ways to learn about the behavior of children and make sure i can be of help with the parents and also the behavior of grownups to/towards children so i can be more effective with children.


Self corrective application:

Whenever i see myself going into a reaction, judgement, irritation about and to/towards children --- I stop--- I breathe and let it go and ground myself here and grab my hands and stay here with the physical one and equal.

Thanks.


Larry Manuela


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