In this blog i will walk myself to nothingness for 7 years onward of self-forgiveness, self-correction and as so i take upon me all that i have accepted and allowed to be HERE as life as me as all.
Saturday, 18 August 2012
Day, 111 Everything Is Mandatory.
My ex. is telling me that the children have a school camp thing to go to, and it is mandatory and besides that, paying for them to go is also mandatory and the date you have to pay is also mandatory. So the school is deciding for me when i need to pay them and if one cannot afford this they will call the: '' attendance officer'' which usually means in this country looking for ways to take your children away from you, because you can't take care of them. Some people belief that in this country they have some ''good rules'' but when you take a closer look to the fucking rules, they are NOT ''good'' at all. I mean by the very starting point already that there needs to be a rule to punish parents when they don't have money to take care of their children is beyond insanity. They have some social services that are to be considered ''good'' but it is a false ''goodness'' because that to is in reality an acceptance of the system as it is. By the very fact that there is this kind of NEED in a so-called: '' rich country,'' like this one i am living in right now which is Holland, it means that the system has failed. Because in a so-called: '' rich country'' ( there cannot be people living in situations where they can't take care of themselves, and that they need to be rescued by a social service fee, and it is not really a rescue but more like a way to make your life a living hell so you can go back to work( being a wage-slave) as soon as possible, it's a passive forceful way to put you back to work ), it doesn't make any sense. Now for those whom don't know how the system works,and have been brainwashed throughout their lives to accept this system no matter what, to them the system is fine, and especially when things are still working for them in the system, they will say: '' these are things you just can't stop within the system, but the system itself is perfectly fine, there is nothing wrong with the system.'' Now this is the level of understanding that amounts to insanity and ignorance of major proportion, to not say: '' STUPIDITY ''
How can i look in my children's eyes and tell them: '' you look at this world, this is what i together with all the parents in this world have been preparing for you, and your future is going to be worse then this, but when you get there your problem, you fix it yourself because i can't do that for you now, right here.'' Do i love my children if i am ALLOWING this SHIT in this world...?? So who are we then if we are NOT even willing to take this ONE decision to STAND for REAL for LIFE and STOP all atrocities in this world, because we owe it to our children, and their children and their children's children. The way things are going, if we continue like this my children maybe won't even be capable of making any children for crying out loud with all the poison that is here in this world created by us humans, and to be more precisely the psychopaths that are walking this world as PARENTS...!!! It is we the parents that are the teachers, we the parents that are the law-makers, we the parents are the politicians, we the parents are the drug addicts, we the parents are the ones going to war and creating war-machines, it is we the parents that are creating all kinds of technology that are deliberately to break in certain specific amount of time after usage...etc etc etc........No child created this fucked system HERE, it is ALL done by PARENTS, like you and me..!! So parents wake the fuck up and STOP doing what you are doing, because you will produce children that will be worse then you are today, as the evident is now more then obvious in this world through the young people..!!! And understand this is NOT an opinion or a belief or a justification or a blame or whatever, it is a factual exposure of what we as parents have done as parents, and are still doing..!!
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let a system exist that dictates what i should and should not do and all of it based on the way of the system and the way of the system is NOT a way that is BEST for all LIFE.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let laws/rules/regulations to be mandatory within this world, without me and everyone else ever having anything to say about them, we were not involved in the decision making and the agreement about those laws/rules/regulations to be implemented on ourselves. So herein i realize we accepted and allowed laws/rules/regulations that enforces us to be slaves,and we are so used to it, that we agree with it fully now,we just accept with our whole hearts our own enslavement through laws/rules/regulations made by the ones whom consider themselves smart and intelligent. In reality they are only smart in destruction to make themselves belief they are in control,when in truth control can never happen in separation, REAL control only exists in ONENESS and EQUALITY.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that in the very word mandatory is implied that it is coming from the outside being superimposed upon me through my acceptance and allowance of it, so i go living under the dictatorship of what is mandated upon me, without me having any saying at all in it.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to react in anger when i found out that i am being put under pressure to abide by the laws/rules/regulations of the system that are mandatory without me having any saying at all in what is to be mandated by others and wherein i MUST obey literally.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to get angry a little bit with my ex. by always coming with this stuff to me, and like in her own way also trying to do the same thing that the system does to everyone, like put a mandate on me to comply with what is being mandatory by/through the government, just because she is afraid that they might come and take the children away.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to still react every time my ex. call me or message me, because most of the times if it is not all of the times, it will be about MONEY and her worries with and about money and asking me for money, that i don't have, and then act all frustrated and stressed when i say that i don't have it with me and give me the fault of her going through all this bullshit which makes me angry at times.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to even connect the word ''anger'' with the word ''mandatory.'' and within this i see that i give the word ''mandatory'' an weight of negativity. Thus i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to to give the words ''mandatory'' a n weight of negativity, for i experience it as a negative thing, because it forces me to do something that is enslaving and confining me and not freeing me, and i see that everything that is not freeing me as negative. So within this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see everything that does not free me as negative, instead of looking at it just as what it is, as something that just doesn't free me and that is it.
I commit myself to show that mandatory laws/rules/regulations where one have not participating in making the decision for them exist and hence when they are implemented enslave one, are all created for the purpose of control or seeming control.
I commit myself to make sure that every time i am about to engage in anger to STOP take a deep breath and make sure i ground myself here, stabilize myself here and touch something that is physical in order to remind me that i am HERE.
I commit myself to show that mandatory laws/rules/regulations done without my consent and to be implemented on myself and everyone else that is not the decision makers are all crimes against LIFE,because decisions that are matters of life and death are being made without me having a saying within it,when it is about my own living, and especially when they are not what is BEST for all LIFE.
I commit myself to show that the laws/rules/regulations in this world in all institutions and establishments and corporations and companies are all laws/rules/regulations to protect these alone and the ones whom own them, but not the people that are being slave for them to keep these entities alive.
I commit myself to show that schools are just another way to make people comply to this system of abuse, and where they start to force one using the children as bates to drill their mandatory bullshit laws/rules/regulations in order to keep the control tight.
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