In this blog i will walk myself to nothingness for 7 years onward of self-forgiveness, self-correction and as so i take upon me all that i have accepted and allowed to be HERE as life as me as all.
Tuesday, 28 August 2012
Day 117 My Breath.
I have been looking at this point for a long while and i see that i still keep on forgetting to BREATHE.
If you are reading and you are not familiar, with what i wrote up there implies, let me explain a little. You see our breath is what is really keeping us alive here, it is a life-support given to all equally.
Now let us have a closer look at this. Have you noticed that even the worst criminal crazy fucker that ever exist is STILL breathing if he/she is not killed by someone else..??
Have you not question why this could be, why LIFE is allowing this individual that is destroying another life to continue...?? I mean it is a just a simple out-breath and it is DONE...!! So what is going on..??
Can it be that everything and everyone IS this BREATH...?? And is this breath supporting what really...?? Is it supporting an idea of yourself, which you call a PERSONALITY(IES) ..?? Or is it supporting the physical reality which your body consist of and exist as....?? Can this be reason why the killers and abuser and cheaters and manipulators and you name it in this world don't just DROP DEAD, breath leaving them before they commit some crime against LIFE.....???
So who am I, really that this breath that is HERE with me as ME all the time supporting me in every way,and that will go to extreme extents to just be with me..?? Why is it NOT giving up on me even when i give up on it many many times..?? Why do i NOT see it as myself when it is right HERE as ME...?? Am i NOT the one that is BREATHING...??
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NEVER ever in my life consider my own breath to be of REAL importance, to be of REAL value, i always saw my breath as just breath, something my body does on it's own.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to even within the sentence above where i state: '' something my body does on it's own'' how far and deep i have separated myself from and as my breath, that it is NOT me, but something apart form me. Within this i realize the simple fact, that how can something be apart from me as in my breath, when I AM the ONE BREATHING. I cannot be apart from something that I myself do.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to deny my own breath by seeing/perceiving/interpreting it as something apart from me, when all the time it is right HERE as ME.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NEVER in all that is HERE be them '' good '' or '' bad '' living actions of us humans, how the breath have managed to stay right HERE through ALL these personalities that see themselves as apart from this BREATH, showing me right HERE in my face, that i am Missing me when i am in my mind believing myself to be this personality in my mind, wherein this is the only place where i am NOT one and equal with and as my BREATH, because my breath is physical, and support all that is physical as for one my human physical body that i have separated myself from within my mind as the personalities i think/belief I am.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NEVER saw how my breath was and is still always but always waiting for me, showing through myself and others as myself that it IS ME, no matter what character i choose to play as myself and as others as myself in this world, my breath Remains right here through the badness and goodness of all men, but yet i don't notice, and i don't even give it my honor let alone my respect for giving so many opportunities to be one and equal with as my BREATH right HERE.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NEVER ever notice/see/realize/understand how by choosing my mind above my breath i was in FACT choosing deliberately to NOT be one and equal with what LIFE is as ME supporting ME and all of LIFE HERE.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself so much within and as my mind that i don't even consider the foolishness of my choice and that it have consequences to ALL of LIFE, because of my deliberate choice to NOT choose LIFE, but instead an illusion that i experience as if that has something to do with and as LIFE. When it cannot even equalize itself as THIS LIFE that I AM.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge man/woman/children to be ''bad'' or '' good'' based on their behaviors without NEVER ever seeing their BREATHING, that i and them are all doing equally right HERE,and never took it at all as something as valuable as what i consider to be given a value as the mind fucks as the separation and the polarity and opposites that i see in others as myself and in myself, avoiding constantly my breath calling me right HERE in myself and in everything else, as an gentle in-breath and a gentle out-breath.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself even when i KNOW my breath to be of very very importance STILL i choose to dwell within the place where i deliberately fuck with myself and miss all that LIFE is all about by limiting myself and give this limitation a great value when in truth it is JUST NOTHING at all compared with MY BREATH. My breath is HERE through all expressions and manifestations always the SAME, never flinging even in the face of the greatest EVIL that can exist as us HUMANS.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use many times my breath as an comparison, but never ever actually for real and in fact LIVE as MY BREATH one and equal. I was using this just as knowledge and information to make myself feel great inside when in reality i am NOT one and equal with that very thing i am talking about, because i never lived it. The occasional moments that i do walk as my breath are very few, but these i use to fro purposes of making myself appear special and to be seen as better or someone that understand some mysterious thing, when in reality all of that is just my mind fuck ups, because my breath is just what it is LIFE giving LIFE, and as that it cannot be special because specialness implies separation, implies '' more then'' and more then implies there must be something that is ''less then.''
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to NEVER ever have questioned my own breath as to why it continued giving LIFE,especially to those whom are taking LIFE, without seeing/realizing/understanding that this BREATH is supporting LIFE and that i am the one that does NOT support LIFE, because my breath is NOT busy with the personalities in an mind, it is busy supporting what is HERE as the physical as itself MANIFEST.
I commit myself to once and for all even when it is initially difficult to start walking more and more as my breath right HERE, so i can ground myself more and more to that which is real and move out of that which is an illusion and even bring that illusion as the energy it extracted from life to be an illusion and bring it all HERE as myself and just be a living breathing being for real of the planet EARTH.
I commit myself to pay attention to my breathing, because it is the only thing together with my body and all that is physical right HERE that i can really trust.
I commit myself to walk as into and as my breath as it should have been from the start, till i am HERE one and equal with and as my breath within and as the physical.
I commit myself to pay attention to others as myself and look at them as a start as just what is HERE as physical breathing bodies,and NOT as personalities in the mind till i am one and equal with them within and as the breath and the physical right HERE so i can assist and support them as myself as them.
I commit myself to start honoring and respecting breath as what it is as LIFE support right here something i should have done from my very inception within this world.
I commit myself to little by little to walk myself within my own breath and stay with and as it, till it is ME for real, till i am My BREATH one and equal for REAL, not that i am breathing alone, but that my breath is the whom i am.
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