Tuesday, 9 October 2012

Day 141, SFS On How Can I Be False Part 2.

So here i  am continuing with my self-forgiveness statements in regard to this one specific point of falseness.

 

                                                       


To have a look at what lead to these self-forgiveness statements, see:


Day 139     and  the intro of self-forgiveness on   Day 140.



Self-forgiveness on the thoughts:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the thought of a woman crying because she felt i did not understood her correctly and i did not give her attention to her deepest pains, wherein i do NOT see/realize/understand at all how i created this thought to exist within me as me yet. Thus i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately forget how i create a thought in me based on memories i have implanted within me to exist within me as me, that i will call ME/I, and on top of all this belief/think that it is me, when the REAL me as my human physical body right here, i am completely unaware of how i am AS IT right HERE and LIVE as IT AS me as ONE as EQUAL as MYSELF as LIFE.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the thought of seeing myself getting into fights physically or argumentatively and due to this i then lay low in order to keep myself NOT getting into conflict/friction, without realizing that this very allowance of this thought is being created as conflict/friction within me that i will eventually end up experiencing as a thought afterwards when parts of my body have been killed and consumed and than been transformed into energy, to exist within me as me as energy as the mind. Thus my energy experience of a thought is where the part(s) of my human physical body that i am still as of right not yet one and equal with/as, have been transformed into energy.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have a thought of a man well-suited up sitting behind a desk and ordering people around and being very abusive to/towards them to exist within me as me as energy as the mind.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the thought of seeing myself not getting some specific task done  and sweat running on my forehead, because i am trying to do it as how someone else want, when i know it doesn't work for me, in can't get it done in his/her way, to exist within me as me as energy as the mind.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the thought where i see myself with my head down and my eyes full of tears and anger to exist within me as me as energy as my mind.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the thought where i see myself laughing at others within my own mind, when they say: '' i know the system is going to get back as it once was.'' to exist within me as me as energy as my mind.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to form thoughts based and charged with judgements of what i perceive/view/interpret about others according to my own past created and held-on accepted and allowed judgmental interpretation based on opinions of others and then taken as my own and shaped/mold to represent myself in a so-called unique way, when all that i am in fact is only that which is of memories within and as myself, just a memory entity as energy.


I realize how all of my thoughts are for real just memories, as their origin within and as myself as the mind that i have accepted and allowed myself to be and become in this world. Thus i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be/become memories as from where i will manifest thoughts to keep me occupy so i do not notice my total separation to my human physical and this whole physical existence HERE, wherein i have no idea whatsoever what it really is.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to make sure i have thoughts to entertain myself within my own self-created separation from myself wherein i only experience some energetics within myself as thoughts/feelings/emotions and NOT at all have a real physical actual and factual interaction and touch with and as my human physical body itself, i am just i pure energy entity within the human body that is dependent of the human body for it to have it's parasitic existence to continue till my body have had enough of the abuse of this parasite within it, that acts as if it is a GOD.


Self-forgiveness on emotions related to the points:


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to feel sorry and sadness for others and due to this try and project an image of myself to others as myself as it exists within my memory-bank, that will suit the moment best for a successful effective agreement for the one on the receiving end, without seeing/realizing/understanding how i and the other are both within that moment agreeing on the same thing, which is that we need our memories to come with some solution to feelings that the memory itself has made sure that we experienced. It is like the blind leading the blind and both pretending that they can see. Within this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to delude others as i delude myself in thinking/believing that what i have as memory are viable and valuable to the HERE moment that is NOT the past as the memory that i am allowing myself to measure the HERE moment with, when the sadness and sorry i feel is nothing more then a memory that is already dead and is NOT HERE anymore, it can only exist as a memory within me when i supercharge it with energy produced by the my human physical body.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let FEAR interfere within and as my existent HERE, in order to make sure that i DO NOT remember how i created the FEAR to exist and be experienced as real and as the ME in this world, in this existence.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go through the experiences of uncomfortableness/uneasiness and frustration due to the fact that the people in the system that accept and allow the system to exist and don't want to STOP it, are doing everything in their power to NOT agree with the message of EQUALITY, so much so that they will go back into their books of knowledge and information from some old dead person, that had some ideas based on their opinions, because none of them were aware at all how their minds really worked thus was just regurgitating what the mind spewed forth/out and took this as some very profound and deep thinking, when in reality when i investigate what they said i can see that most if not all of them whom said some great things, were speaking out of separation in some form or another and wanted to form something else but again in separation from those they deem as wrong/bad/negative/not deserving to be part of their newly molded and in another jacket separation continuation and this is NOT equality at ALL..!! 


EQUALITY is about honoring and giving value to LIFE that is EQUAL as ONE in everyone and everything and live according to this principle always in all kinds of ways, leaving nothing and no-one behind..!!!


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the emotion as impatient experience to exist within me as me as energy as my mind, due to the fact that i am sensing that people are NOT getting the simple message just because they don't want to, and because of this not seeing/realizing/understanding that in the suffering that will flow out of this, will not be just for them that seem safe now, but for all participants in this world, for the good/bad, for the right/wrong, for the positive/negative humans, all must suffer in one way or another in order to understand that we are all together in each breath creating this mess that is HERE that the majority is thinking/believing that they did not for whatever positive belief they may have about themselves.



Thanks, to be continued tomorrow..................



Larry Manuela


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