Wednesday, 9 May 2012

Day 25, The Seeking part 1

In this blog i am going to do self-forgiveness for the times i have invested in seeking for the answer for life and in life when i did not see/realize/understand that the answer was and is right here in my face in front of me as the physical body and  the physical reality of earth, the whole physical existence.


Self-forgiveness:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe in the believes my parents past onto me from childhood, that there is a greater being in existence that is called ''God'' that is the creator of everything and everyone,which from that moment on made me wonder because i could not see nor communicate with this greater being called ''God.''

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to start looking for an answer just because this ''God'' was nowhere to be seen or to be contacted.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe in the bible at first, because that is what my parents were/are believing in.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to follow the believe my parents were having in this bible.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be defined as a Christian, because as a Christian, it means you are a follower of Jesus.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to never ever really question my believe in this Christian faith.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to keep on looking for answers when i couldn't find any answers to why the things are the way they are, without seeing/realizing/understanding that ''keep looking'' means separating myself more from myself as life here.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to venture into the spirituality mentality when i couldn't find any answers in the religions of this world so i took the road of spirituality, and yet therein i also couldn't find the answer i was looking for.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go through a lot of research as of knowledge and information to look for an answer but never could find one.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to read a lot of books that as of right now, i cannot even remember all the names and titles of all the books i have devoured within my search for an answer to life, to why i am here and how come i am here, and what happened exactly.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use meditation as a form of trying to find out if what they say one ''experience'' as ''oneness'' is really/truly so.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to read a lot of knowledge and information in the esoteric fields as in trying to find maybe some hidden knowledge or truth that could lead me to understand my purpose and my ''why i am here without any remembrance whatsoever as in how i got here''

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go look into ''conspiracy theories'' as in trying to find some hidden truth that is being kept away from the public so i may find an answer to my quest as in why am i here and what is here.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for answers outside myself as in forms as books and the like in stead of having an intimate relationship with my own mind, which is what i define myself as and in.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for answers in knowledge and information about out of this world information coming in through channelings in this world, without questioning how it is they don't take a real stance and standing for life and come up with practical solution for the individual and the whole group as humanity.

To be continued in part 2........................


Thanks.

Larry Manuela


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